


When night falls

by SentinelCipher



Category: Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
Genre: F/M, Flirting, Mutual Pining, Sexual Tension, Slow Burn, Thieves Guild Questline, love's not a competition but I ain't gonna let you win, which will get resolved eventually don't worry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-26
Updated: 2020-01-05
Packaged: 2020-02-04 10:46:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 25,151
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18602953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SentinelCipher/pseuds/SentinelCipher
Summary: Or 'The course of becoming a Nightingale does not always run smoothly.'Mara grabbed a small dagger from the table and threw it into the wall beside him.“ That was the warning shot. Didn't our agreement include you not breaking in?” Glancing over at her door, she coudn't see any bolted locks. Great. Her home was about as easy to break into as the jewelry box at the market.“ You explicitly mentioned my ‘lads and lasses’ not stealing from you. Never said anything about me.”She cursed under her breath. “ I’ll remember to weigh my words more carefully next time I make a deal with you. If at all. What do you want?"





	1. Show me what you’re made of

**Author's Note:**

> First chapter is kind of exposition and these two testing the waters but I promise it will get a lot more interesting soon enough. ;)
> 
> Thank you for reading, enjoy and let me know what you think or leave a kudos if you liked it!

Battered and bruised, in half-ruined leather armour and while still casting a healing spell, Mara entered Riften. She knew she looked a little worse for wear but that just allowed her to blend in better. She liked Riften because of how alive it felt, a home for rogues and rascals.  


“Never done an honest day’s work in your life for all that coin you’re carrying, eh lass?”  
On second thought, she loved it when those rascals left her alone. She turned around slowly to find a relatively good-looking man with ginger hair, green eyes and clothes which didn't seem to match the way in which he carried himself in the slightest. The stranger looked vaguely familiar... he had been around during visits in which she bolted past him. What? Fire salts weren't going to deliver themselves. But she'd be lying if she claimed that voice had no effect on her.  
Still. Hardly a way to introduce yourself.

“I’m sorry, what?”  
“ I’m saying you’ve got the coin but you didn’t earn a septim of it honestly. I can tell.”  
She gave him a beaming smile “ Oh my, can you? You know what? It’s your lucky day!” Her face fell as she continued with a “Because I’m too tired for this today and my wealth is none of your business.” 

She broke eye contact and tried to walk past him while checking the gashes in her bracers. He kept moving in front of her. “ You should hear me out lass, see wealth _is_ my business. Maybe you’d like a taste?”  
“ Of that stuff in your market stall?” She glanced over at it. “No thanks. I'm only here for some new leather armour. So do us both a favour and find someone else to bother." He opened his mouth again but she cut him off; "You have twenty seconds before I consider punching you worth going to jail for.”  
“ I’ve got a bit of an errand to perform,…”  
She scoffed. “1…2…3…”

“…but I need an extra pair of hands. And in my line of work, extra hands are well-paid.”  
Mara stopped counting, looked at him with a blank expression for a few seconds and broke out laughing.  
“ I’m sorry but, _divines_ , have you misread me. I am ehm… not in the business for pleasure of the night types of ‘errands’. More of an adventurer in other ways; re-deading draugr, fetching family heirlooms, that kind of thing? But hey, I am sure you’ll find someone!”  
He was still processing what she meant, when she walked past him.

“ What? No, that is not at all what I need your help with.”  
" How about you tell me what you want without being cryptic?”  
“ I’m going to cause a distraction and you’re going to steal Madesi’s silver ring from a strongbox under his stand. Once you have it I want you to place it in Brand-Shei’s pocket without him noticing. You tell me when you’re ready and we’ll get started.”  
“ How about _no_.”  
“ There is coin in this for you, plenty of it.”  
“ I don’t need your coin,”  
“ Or armour… perhaps even a spot in my guild if you play your cards right.”  
“ A guild, huh? So I presume you’re the ‘all kinds of nasty people’ Sapphire hangs out with?"  
He looked taken aback. “ You know Sapphire? “  
“ Not really, I just cleared a guy’s debt with her. But fine. As you are clearly understaffed today, I'll help. On one condition: I do this and your 'lads and lasses' from the guild never trespass or steal anything from my home. I’ll be living right over *there* soon and I'd hate for any of my things to mysteriously go missing. Do we have a deal?”  
He grinned and she sensed that she had missed some important detail.“ Sure, lass. Why not. Wait until I start the distraction and then show me what you’re made of.”

The man started to yell for everyone to come see him. She walked over to the booth he had pointed at and picked the lock of its only chest within seconds. Blending into the audience took little effort and Brand-Shei was wearing an outfit with far too deep pockets. She almost felt sorry for the argonian when she dropped the ring in his pocket. Before taking her leave, she made it to the front line of people looking at her unlikely ally and nodded at him. When he winked in return, she rolled her eyes and made her way back to her new home. No need to raise suspicion. Buying armour would have to wait for another time.  


The warmth from the hearthfire greeted her and all she wanted to do was slump into a chair. 

“Hail to you, my thane.”  
Mara jumped. Right. Another housecarl. Iona. Still tense enough to shout her name appearantly.  
“ Iona, please just call me Mara?" " My apologies for startling you." " No, I should have..." remembered you were there? Checked my surroundings? Nevermind that. " I mean... it's fine Iona. You did an great job protecting this place and looking over people bringing in the furniture. I suggest you take the night off. You’ve been cooped up here for long enough.”  
“ But, my th…”  
“ But Mara…” Mara smiled, in an attempt to show she wasn't trying to dismiss her out of dislike or anger.  
“ ...I am sworn to guard and protect you and this house.”  


Mara sighed and rubbed her temple. “ Would you *like* to have a night off?”  
Iona seemed torn. Mara tossed a small pouch of coins on the table before resting a hand on each of her housecarl's shoulders. “ Go do something you want to do, something you like. Have a drink, go to the temple, buy yourself some sweetrolls, visit a lover, ... whatever it is you've more than earned some fun. Take a break, okay? I would like to be alone tonight anyway. Feel free to stay at the Bee and Barb, I’m paying.”  
“ Are you certain, my tha...?”  
“ Yeah! Don’t have too much of their homebrew stuff though, it's good but I ended up with a bit of a hangover.”  
“ I mean…”  
“ Oh! Yes. Also the content of that bag is all yours. Now go. Live a little.”

Iona picked up the pouch and left with a small grateful smile in Mara's general direction. As soon as the door closed, the thane of Riften dropped on top of one her way too uncomfortable chairs. With a groan she got up again, took her damaged armour off and put the many things in her bag and on her person in their new designated spots. Soul gems under the enchanting table, herbs nearest to the outside area, weapons on the designated racks, ruined armour... well on the shelf for now. Next stops: a bath and more comfortable clothes. Still drying her hair with a clean rag, she eyed the fresh ingredients on the cupboard. “Let’s see if I still know how to make soup.”  


With a bowl of hot tomato soup in her lap and some bread in hand she sat cross-legged on her rug. Her loose shirt allowed the hearthfire's heat to warm her skin more easily. Her muscles still ached but not as badly as she thought they would when she got knocked down by that damn shouting draugr. _The audacity._ She looked at some daggers in dire need of sharpening on the table. Nope. Not today. The small patio she remembered finding after her first visit would be more interesting. She looked up at the starry sky. Ignoring the slight smell from the water below, this place almost felt like home. 

When she re-entered her house, she found a figure leaning against the wall.  
“ Nice place you have here, lass.” The low, gruff voice was easy to link a face to this time. The man bounced off of the wall and walked into the light, looking her up and down. She looked down at her own clothes. _Well shit._ She was barefeet, with a loose shirt reaching just below her thighs. It was a far cry from her usual ‘decent’ look. She lunged for a small dagger from the table and aimed it at the wooden framing of the fireplace right beside the... well, stranger. He ducked in spite of not being in its trajectory. _Good_. Glancing over at her door, she coudn't see any bolted locks. Great. Her home was about as easy to break into as the jewelry box at the market.  
“ That was the warning shot. Didn't our agreement include you _not_ breaking in?”  
“ You explicitly mentioned my ‘lads and lasses’ in our deal. Never said anything about me.”  
She cursed under her breath. “ I’ll remember to weigh my words more carefully next time I make a deal with you. If ever. What do you want? Because if you are here to steal my valuables, you're hardly subtle enough to pull it off. "  
“ Excuse my entrance. The name's Brynjolf." He extended his hand to her but she just crossed her arms and lifted her head in contempt. He dropped his hand back to his side. "All right... I’m bringing you what you are owed.“ he threw a bag of coins her way, she caught it with ease and threw it back without even gancing inside.  


“ I was promised a non-trespassing agreement. Perhaps armour if you insist on bringing me gifts.”  
“ Ah, well if it is armour you want, you will have to come fetch it at our headquarters, lass. We have quite the uniform, with some enchantments that might be... useful for someone with your skillset.”  
“ Will that be all?”  
He seemed to hesitate for a second. “ Yes. I will take my leave now. Have a nice evening, lass.”  
She looked at his back when he reached for the door and realised she might have been a bit hard on him. Maybe. A little. 

“ Brynjolf?”  
He turned around, hand still on the doorknob.  
“ Care to stay and have a drink with me instead?"  
He raised an eyebrow. “ This feels like a trap. "  
" My traps are less obvious, trust me.”  
" You wanted to kill me seconds ago, lass.”  
Mara waved her hand “ If I wanted to kill you you would not be walking out unscathed. And as a thane I can't just have everyone break in to my place you know."  
“ Thane?”  
Mara groaned. “ I think I prefer lass over Thane. The Thane thing gets old fast.”  
“ I definitely should leave if you've got that title.” he mumbled the words so quietly that she barely heard them.  
He tried to open the door but she moved right in front of him and pushed it closed with her back, trying mimic his body language from the market. “ You should hear me out 'lad', see … “ Mara looked around and pointed at some bottles on her shelf. “Wine aaand…" she looked around and gestured at the cheese wheel "...cheese are my business. Want a taste?”  
Brynjolf looked amused.  
" You just caught me on a bad day. I've been a bit harsh on you and... I promise I don't have an ulterior motive. Mostly. Yet."  
He stepped away from the door and raised his hands in mock surrender.  
“ Fair enough. But I would like to know what the name of our new Thane is first.  
Mara smiled, took off her necklace and dangled its pendant in front of his face.  
“ Let’s just say that necklace is Mara’s in more ways than one.”


	2. This one is different

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mara shows she can rival him in more ways than one. Who won? What's next? You decide.

Brynjolf muttered as he toyed with the amulet in his hand; “Should have known.”  
Mara tilted her head and squinted her eyes. “What was that?”  
“ Oh nothing important, lass. “  
“ No really, why should you have known my name?”  
He sat down on the chair across from her. “A woman as lovely as you just had to be named after the goddess of love.”  
Mara rolled her eyes and crossed her arms. “You… wanna try that again? Or is that your best line?”  
She brushed against his arm before she sat down and flung legs over her chair's arm rest. It was her home and she would sit any way she damn well pleased. When she looked up, she looked right in the eyes of Brynjolf. He was staring and looked lost in thought, as if he tried to figure something out. 

" Hello? Nirn to Brynjolf?"

She noticed the concern in his eyes when he finally made eye contact with her again.“ You should not invite strangers into your home like this. Not everyone has good intentions in this city.”  
“ May I remind you that you broke in? ”  
“ Inviting people who break into your home for a drink is arguably a worse plan.”  
“ In my experience people who don’t announce their presence immediately after they have entered are the ones with bad intentions.”  
He sat down on the chair across from her and leaned forward, elbows on his knees and hands clasped together. “ Your name has been going around, lass. You may be helping people but you have pissed off Maven as well. She isn’t pleased about the way you spoke to her. “  
Mara scoffed. “I don’t get why nobody else speaks to her the way I do. She’s a short throw from a hagraven.”  
“ Aye, that she may be. But she’s very powerful as well. Anyone here can tell you that that 'hagraven' truly runs this city. We do jobs for her but so does the dark brotherhood. _Those _are the ones you really need to look out for. I heard rumours she was planning a hit on, her words, "some wannabe-goddess" not too long ago.”__

____

Mara's eyes glazed over before she got up off her chair and started to rummage around in her bag. “Oh really?”  
The woman looked nothing like she had when she invited him in, her playful demeanor had made room for something darker. She tossed a letter in his general direction. Before Brynjolf opened it, he noticed some dried blood next to its already broken seal. Reading the content, his eyes widened and he looked up at her again.  
He looked concerned when he tossed the paper back onto table and looked at her. “ You’re lucky you lived to tell the tale. Few do.”  
She kept standing and conjured a flame atronach beside the fireplace, before a fire sprouted from her hand. She looked at them calmly and played with the flames. “ Power comes in different forms. She is lucky she is so well-connected. But I am working on the connections too now, I suppose. “

The corners of Brynjolf’s mouth curled up a bit and there was a mysterious glint in his eye that she could not quite figure out the meaning of. “Is that _all _I am to you, Mara? A potential connection to take Maven down with?”  
When she balled her left hand into a fist, Brynjolf heard a sizzle and noticed some smoke coming from between her fingers. The atronach started twirling elegantly while her master sat back down. She still sounded serious, but... no longer borderline threatning. “Is that not all I am to you? Another connection that could have some use to your guild? A potential victim of your thieving ways?” She leaned forward. “Or were you hoping for a conquest? Why _did _you come here Brynjolf? Surely you were in no rush to part with your hard-conned septims? There is no way I will believe that you don't recall me saying that I didn’t want your coin. So enlighten me, what is in it for you to come visit me? “____

_____ _

The look he gave her shifted from interest into something else. He looked as if he remembered something important and leaned away from her.  
“You did your job well and my organization's been having a run of bad luck, but I suppose that's just how it goes.”  
Mara poured some wine into a glass. “ Maybe you’re just in business with the wrong people. Are you the leader of the guild?”  
“ I am not. The group I represent…”  
“ The thieves guild.”  
“… has its home in the Ratway beneath Riften. We own a tavern called the Ragged Flagon. I usually say get there in one piece and we'll see if you've really got what it takes... but that should be no problem for you.” He glanced over at the atronach.  
Mara nodded and took a sip of wine. “I could consider it. But what’s in it for me?”  
“ Armor, guild protection, fences, discounts on creatively acquired goods, ...”  
The atronach disappeared. “ And what else? Surely you can be more persuasive than that. ”  
“ What do you want?” His voice sounded deeper, purposefully so. This definitely wasn’t his first try at this. Ah, two could play that game.  
She shrugged. “ I want looking into someone’s eyes as they are barely visible from under a hood, knowing we are the only two people aware of our presence. I want the thrill of the chase, including panting against a wall after a quick escape with cold air stinging in my lungs …”  
He didn’t reply but stared into her eyes instead, ever so confident and with a sly grin still on his lips. He only glanced down at her lips for a fraction of a second but that was all it took for her to know she had him right where she wanted. “You think you can offer me that, ‘lad’?”

He broke eye contact, breathed out slowly and grabbed her glass from her hand. Five seconds later it was back on the table, empty.  
“You might just turn our luck around and I know better than to get too closely acquainted to a new recruit. Let’s first check whether you are truly guild material. “  
She smiled. “ Don’t flatter yourself. I know your type.”  
He got up from his seat, leaned on both arm rests of hers and looked her straight in the eyes. Whatever he had done to get back his cool, it had worked and she hated it. “ _Do you, now?_ “  
She leaned back in her chair to create some distance but kept glaring back. “ You’re a smooth-talking conman with a dodgy way of making a living. Your guild is your family, that’s why you were taken aback when I mentioned Sapphire and probably why you keep saying ‘the operation I present’. Your love is for them, everything else is a distraction. And I intrigue you because I am no blushing mess and certainly not inviting you into my bed, yet haven’t slapped you across the face yet either..." She leaned forward again. " _How far off am I?_ ”  
He pushed a strand of her hair behind her ear and she felt some heat rising to her cheeks as his fingers grazed her skin. “ No blushing mess, aye? Come see us at the Ragged Flagon.”

Brynjolf opened the door and left without even one more glance at her. While he walked out, she could feel her eyes on him. He had a hard time forcing himself to keep walking without looking back. Just the image of that woman leaning against the doorpost, with her brown hair cascading down past her shoulders and her keen eyes tracking him... He turned the corner and finally heard the door close. As soon as he did, he stopped, allowed the gulp of air he hadn't realised he was holding back to escape and took another look at necklace she had not asked back. The gem in the middle had the same colour as her eyes. Of course it had. 

__

“ You’re back late.”  
Vex's voice came from his right, and he noticed her and Delvin sitting side by side. A sight to behold, that. “ We’re thieves, little Vex. We do our best work at night. “  
Vex, Dune and Delvin looked at each other a little too amused for his comfort. Vekel rolled his eyes at them.  
They all remained silent, waiting for him to speak. “ Spit it out, what's going on here? Have you two finally consommated your love for each other? Or is it hatred? Hard to keep up.” Vex scowled at Delvin and scooted a little to the side.   
Delvin, looking slightly hurt, spoke up this time. “ Sapphire noticed Iona at the Bee and Barb and wanted to check if anyone was home in Honeyside. Find out if there were any interesting goods there. But you had already made your way inside... anything you want to tell us, Bryn?”  
“ We can use allies. And thieves as quick as her, especially thieves with a reputation and title that can make guards look the other way.”  
Delvin nodded with a look of disbelief still on his face. “ Suuure, the nice legs are just an added bonus then?  
Brynjolf looked up at him and spoke in a more steadfast manner than he thought he still could. " Nothing happened." " My condoleances." Ah, Sapphire had joined the conversation from the shadows. He ignored the comment and continued. " Our new thane might be just what we need to turn our luck around."

Dirge walked in, seemingly just awake. “We've all heard that one before, Bryn! Quit kidding yourself."  
Vekel looked over at him from polishing a glass. "It's time to face the truth, old friend. You, Vex, Mercer... you're all part of a dying breed. Things are changing."  
Brynjolf shook his head and thought of the necklace in his pocket. “I'm telling you, this one is different...”


	3. What happens next?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mara visits the ragged flagon for the first time. Or, well, an attempt was made.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inching closer. Bit by bit.

The tunnels below the city were dimly lit, smelly and by all means even less pleasant to hang out in than most of the crypts she had visited. She had heard rumours. A draugr wouln’t be caught dead here, but plenty of people seemed to have found their death by roaming the tunnels she had just entered. Bandits, undead, necromancers… they all seemed predictable to her now. Some deranged sadistic serial killer? Not so much. She swallowed hard before she drew her shield and carefully moved forward. A blazing atronach would draw far too much attention. 

A few bandits, skeevers and some men in rags who attacked her on sight. One had bear traps all over the place, forcing her to summon an atronach who floated just high enough to be unscathed while she got her leg out of it. All in all, this was going better than expected. Until a creaky gate opened and she found something which sent shivers down her spine. A tree stump with an axe wedged into it and a basket beside it. She saw no body in the eerie light shining down from above, a spotlight on the scene, but she took a step back and felt her legs start to shake. 

 

“Snap out of it. You’re not there. You’re fine. You’re alive, there was a dragon. You’re okay.” A single lunar moth gently fluttered her way and she took a step back, determined not to let it touch her. Whatever it was, the ghost of the dead who had fallen there, an omen of something worse or just a bug… she did not want to find out. She ran past the area and found a table with a man in front of it. He attacked on sight as all the others before him, whit a mace nonetheless. The atronach took care of him after Mara had managed to swing past her target entirely. Her heart was still beating far too fast. Her hands still shaking. "Get yourself together." 

Then there it was. The Ragged Flagon.

She was greeted with a “"Dying breed, eh? Well what do you call that then!" from what sounded like Brynjolf.  
“ Hold up, are you placing bets on whether I’d make it here alive? Well that makes this decision so much easier. I’m out. I’m not working for someone who bets against me.”  
A bald, broad man yelled back. “He was betting _on you actually!” ___  
She rolled her eyes and stomped back to the door, ignoring Brynjolf’s protests until he had closed the distance and grabbed her arm. He took a step closer to her and looked at her arm. She was shaking.  
“ Are you all right?”  
Mara yanked her arm back and hissed back “I’m fine. I’m also leaving. And don’t you dare break into my home again, I won’t miss this time.”  
She walked through the door and heard it shut behind her. That and footsteps.  
“ Hear me out, lass. You don’t know why I said that.” She kept going at a steady pace until she stopped in her tracks.The lunar moth was gently fluttering around on the air current right in front of the entrance to the tree stump area. 

____

Brynjolf carefully moved in her direction and drew his dagger. He was not sure what had sparked this woman with fire in her eyes to stop in her track like that.  
When he reached her he sheathed it again. “ Are you afraid of moths?” She shook her head. He looked at the background. The axe. The basket “So the rumours are true… you are…“ he reached for her and dropped his arm again, not sure if she’d want him to touch her. “Come back with me. There’s another way out of here. A safer one, too."  
He noticed she nodded slowly and reached for her hand. She first recoiled at the touch and then looked back at his face, a hint of recognition, then tears, then she was in his arms. She didn’t look at him anymore but just clung to him with her head on his chest and her hands grabbing onto the back of his shirt. As gentle as possible, he held onto her. One hand on her back, the other on the back of her head. “I’ve got you. I’m sorry, I swear nobody placed bets on or against your life. Ve… the bartender… had just claimed that thieves like us are a dying breed.”

He looked over her head to see ashes on the floor and swallowed. “ I’ll bring you back home. Just follow me. Ignore the others.”  
She let go of him and looked up. The hue of her irises seemed a brighter blue against her reddened eyes, no longer a blue-grey mix. She looked up and exhaled loudly. “Okay. But I can’t just walk in and walk out again. They will never accept me back if I walk in as a sobbing girl now.”  
She was right. Any sign of weakness would be perceived as caused by something else than trauma without an explanation, weak-heartedness out of rejection perhaps. Mara grabbed a bottle from her backpack and handed it to the rogue in front of her. Cupping her hands she nodded at him. He uncorked the liquid and smelled it before he poured the liquid onto them. She splashed it onto her face.  
“It's just cooled water. Again.”

Her eyes looked less puffy when she was done with the splashing. “Give me a minute or two and I’ll look okay again. Feel free to go inside, I’ll come after you.”  
He looked at the door, then back at her. She was slumped down on the floor with her back against a wall. looking at the entrance she had failed to pass.

He sat beside her.  
“ Does this mean you really were at Helgen when the dragon attacked?”  
“ Yeah. But somehow dragons don’t have that kind of effect on me. And you will tell no one that this does. “  
“ Your secret is safe with me.”  
She scoffed. “I find that hard to believe. But I have no other choice. You could have warned me by the way. About the bandits, skeevers, those damn bear traps…”. 

Brynjolf noticed the holes in her pants and some dried red liquid on them but no wounds. “How’d you do that, lass?”  
She glanced at him sideways and turned her body towards him. “Give me your arm.”  
He hesitated but did as she asked while she grabbed her dagger.  
“ You trust me?”  
Brynjolf eyed the glimmer of the metal. That blade looked a lot sharper than what he had seen on her table the night before. Her grin was not helping. 

“ No.” She lifted his sleeve but he didn’t yank back his hand at all. “Tough luck, 'lad'.”

She cut into his arm and immediately poured a liquid on it which stung like mad. “Healing magic works to mend any type of rupture but doesn’t fend off all nasty infections. This does. ” She then lifted her hand over his arm and a warm light enveloped it. It felt good, warm and comforting. The wound healed instantly, with no visible scar. “There. I just can’t mend armour with it. Or cloth.”  
“ I thought mages train to master one school of magic. Aren't you a summoner?”

She closed her eyes, leaned her head against the wall and sighed. “ Conjurer. Same thing I suppose. But I am a bit of everything and master little. It keeps me and my allies alive.”  
Brynjolf looked over at her. Her eyes were still closed, her lashes no longer glued together by tears. Her brown hair reached just past her shoulders, her aquiline nose was in the air by how she had tilted her head and so were her slightly chapped lips. He noticed the corners of her mouth going up.  
“Did nobody ever tell you staring is considered impolite?”  
“ Aye, somewhere alongside that breaking and entering is. What can I say, I see something beautiful and I keep my eyes on the prize.”  
She laughed and he smiled at the sound. “ See? That was much better than your line at the market place. There is hope for you yet.”  
“ Who said it was a line, lass?” She opened her eyes and looked at him. Neither of them looked away for several seconds, until she looked at her hands in her lap. “What happens now?”  
“ I’ll introduce you to Delvin and Vex and you will get your first job.”  
“ Then?”  
“ Then you will meet Mercer. Our guild leader. He will… be sceptical but he tends to be.”

She got up and he looked up at her with an arm on his knee. “You sure you’re ready lass?”  
“ Can’t sit around here. You may not have any plans tonight beyond this, but I do Brynbryn.”  
“ Already on nickname basis, are we, lass?”  
“ Let's see... you call me lass all the time... you know of my past trauma, broke into my home, drank my wine and stared at my face for several minutes. Yes, Brynbryn. We are. So… you coming or what?“

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> She may be renowed, powerful, but she did not always feel that way. (Also she deserved a hug, damnit. )


	4. I'd like to see her try

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meeting some of the guilds best and brightest. Oh and nearly knocking Brynjolf off of a barstool in shock.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Special thanks to lozzy101 for faithfully commenting on every chapter so far. Really appreciate it. :)

When she opened the door she noticed only few people present. A white-haired woman, the bald, broad man from before and someone behind the bar.  
“ Hey.” She whispered to Brynjolf. “Who’s who?”  
“ The smug looking one’s Delvin, the scowling one is Vex. The bartender is Vekel.” He whispered back. 

“ Lured your girl back, did ya Bryn?” The bald man looked at them together approvingly. As if she was in on something that neither of them knew.  
“ _His_ girl? Oh, he wishes, _Del_ is it? “  
Delvin laughed and pointed at her while looking at Brynjolf. “I like this one.”  
Mara raised an eyebrow. “This one? Does he bring along people that often?”  
“ _Perhaps._ Lemme guess. He plucked you off the street and dropped you into the thick of things without tellin' you which way is up. Am I right?"  
She smiled and shrugged. “ _Perhaps_. But I suppose I could use some advice.”  
Delvin put his drink down on the table and got up, shaking her hand once but firmly. “See, that kind of attitude comes from someone who wants to get rich and stay alive long enough to enjoy it. We're goin' to get along nicely. So, if you've got the nerve, I've got plenty of extra jobs to help get the Guild back on its feet."  
Brynjolf sat down on a bar stool while Delvin gestured at a chair across from the one he had been sitting on. They seemed to have hit it off just fine.

“ You’re right. She is something else all right.” Vex had appeared behind Brynjolf. He was used to it by now.  
“ Relax, nobody is going to take your place in the guild.”  
Vex scoffed. “I’d like to see her _try_.”  
Mara put up her hand before she turned away from Delvin and towards the white-haired woman who stood beside him at the bar. She made no effort to hide that both she and Brynjolf had been looking at the new kid on the block. “ You must be Vex. Don’t worry. I know when I am among betters. I don’t intend to rival you.” She then turned around to face Delvin again.  
Brynjolf looked proud as he leaned towards Vex. “ She has pretty good hearing. Helpful when breaking in. “ Vex rolled her eyes and ordered a drink.

“ Thane Mara is it? As a little birdie seems to have told you, name's Delvin.”  
“ Mara will do just fine.”  
“ Good. 'Cuz we’re not so big on titles here. Look around you. The Flagon, the Guild...” She did, for the first time. Leaking water all around, cobwebs and little life beyond a few people hanging around. She wondered if this was truly all there was to the renowed Thieves' Guild she had heard so much about. Tales of the Grey Fox and rumours of the Hero of Kvatch among them seemed… unlikely gossip now. Or could the differences in province cause such a difference? Delvin spoke again. “It's all fallin' apart. A few decades ago, this place was as busy as the Imperial City. Now, you're lucky if you don't trip over a skeever instead.”  
“ What happened?”  
“Look, I know the others think I'm a bit daft for sayin' stuff like this, but I'm gonna give it to you straight. _Somethin'_ out there is piss-drunk mad at us. I don't know who or what it is, but it's beyond just you and me. We've been cursed."  
“ How are we gonna turn that around?”  
“ We spit in that curse's face and turn things around down here. “  
“ I advise against it if it involves a deadra. Wound up drunk enough to steal from the priestesses of Dibella, sell a goat that was not mine to a giant and get married…”

She heard coughing behind her and a cup being put down rather forcefully. “ You’re _married_?”  
She turned around. “ Look, when Sanguine invites you for a drinking party, just watch out.” Delvin started laughing behind her and Vekel stared at her, no longer polishing the cup he was holding.  
“ I really like this one, Bryn.” Brynjolf ignored him in favour of continuing to frown at her. Mara grinned when she noticed he tried to glance down at her hands. She showed them to him and wiggled her fingers.  
“ Hard to tell a wedding ring from enchanted rings isn’t it? Jealousy looks good on you, Brynjolf.”  
The redhead just sighed and ordered another drink from Vekel. 

“Anyway Delvin, you were saying?”  
“ We’re gonna put things back the way they were. That's where you come in. I've got plenty of work available that could guide us down the road to recovery. All you need to do is ask and we can both come out of this smellin' like a rose.".”  
“ Gladly. This place could use a more pleasant smell.“ She shook his hand again, intending to find Vex next when Delvin stood up with her and spoke up again. This time, with his back turned against Brynjolf and much, much quieter. “ You seem like a good sort. Brynjolf has a bit of a reputation but he ain’t too bad. “  
“ A reputation?”  
“ Ah. You haven't heard. Well, you will just have to ask him. He’ll ask you about your… marital status soon enough by the looks of it, anyway. “  
“ What about Vex? What do you reckon she will ask me? “  
“ Ah , Vex… first of all, she is off limits. She'll figure out she ain't too sure about not wanting me one day.”

“ You’re delusional Delvin. Can you even spell that? “ Vex side-glanced him with an air of annoyance while she walked towards Mara. “ Before we begin, I want to make two things perfectly clear. One, I'm the best infiltrator this rathole of a Guild's got, so if you think you're here to replace me, you're dead wrong. And two, you follow my lead and do exactly as I say... no questions, no excuses. It's time to get your feet wet and I don't want to waste a lot of time talking about anything but business. For now, you get your first assignment from Brynjolf."  
Mara nodded, deciding against trying to shake Vex’ hand as well. She’d probably just walk right past her anyway. Mara headed to the bar.

“ Married, aye?” She ignored Brynjolf's comment and looked over at the bartender.  
“ I heard you said thieves like these are a dying breed… am I still welcome here then?” She put some septims in front of her and he poured her a drink.  
“ I don't know about the others, but I sure am glad to see a fresh face down here. The Flagon used to be packed every night with the boys from the Guild but now look at it. Last few years have been pretty bad. I've almost closed this place up.”  
“ Everyone seems to point out the state of 'this place' to me. You sure you want me here? ”  
“ Depends on how well you fair during your first jobs, lass. How about handling a few deadbeats for me? ” She turned towards Brynjolf.  
“ Deadbeats? Kind of like you or…?”  
“ You want in or not?”  
“ Oh you’re no fun. Fine. What did they do Brynbryn?” Vekel coughed and looked at Brynjolf with a mocking expression.  
“ Tell her, _Brynbryn_.” Delvin also seemed to have decent hearing. Mara raised her glass to him.  
“ First of all, everyone mind your own business will ya? And you, _Thane_ …” She opened her mouth in shock.  
“ Oh you did not just-“  
" They owe our organization some serious coin and they've decided not to pay. I want you to explain to them the error of their ways.”

She sipped from her drink. Not nearly as bad as she had expected. “Who are they?”  
“ Keerava, Bersi Honey-Hand and Haelga. Do this right, and I can promise you a permanent place in our organization."  
“ Fine. But I don’t kill to get a message from you across. How did you want me to handle it? “  
“ Killing's bad for business. Honestly, the debt is secondary here. What's more important is that you get the message across that we aren't to be ignored.”  
She nodded. “Consider it done.” 

“ You don’t need any tips, then?”  
“ I’ll take a cut instead of a tip. “  
“ Details on your marks.”  
She started counting on her fingers. “Bersi is being cheated on by his gold-digging wife but that would rude to use. He seemed really proud of that dwarven urn though when I sold him some things. Haelga… use her lovers for blackmail? Nah. She might be proud over it. Dibella, all that.”  
“ The statue of the Divine at the bunkhouse. Use it as leverage and she’ll cave.”  
She nodded. “ Keereva … no clue how to handle her. Any ideas?”  
“ Keerava's stubborn, but she's got a soft spot for family. Talk to Talen-Jei at the Bee and Barb and see if you can get something out of him. They're... well acquainted if you catch my meaning."  
She sighed. “ That feels dirty. Using her lover against her like that.”  
Brynjolf shrugged. “She didn’t pay. Besides… as a thief you sometimes have to get down and dirty.”  
She leaned forward, to whisper in his ear. “ I bet that’s what you tell all the girls. Perhaps I have gotten married in a drunken stupor… but _you_ have a reputation. “  
Then she leaned back again, winked and hopped off of her chair. Brynjolf hadn’t even flinched. Focussed on keeping up that poker face. Very well. “Consider it done. By tonight I’ll have your money. I’ll bring it around tomorrow. Now, that exit you told me about...”

He got off of his chair too and walked with her. “You have not met everyone yet but there will be time for that later. We should only talk to Mercer when you have completed these jobs. He won’t take you seriously before you have done them.”  
“ He seems cosy. But don’t worry, I’ve got it covered as long as I don’t have to pass the ratways anymore.”  
“ You won’t. “ He guided her towards a latch and climbed up behind him until they appeared in front what seemed like a small dark enclosed space. She could only hear their breathing and swallowed. His back was towards her and the stone was already lowering, light started to seep in. She had missed what he had done to get it to do that entirely. She stepped out, past him a little too fast. 

“ A tomb? You sure this isn’t the Dark Brotherhood?”  
He put his finger on his mouth as he took a step back and pressed the stone again.  
“ Wait! How …” The stone was up. “…can I get in here from the outside. _Damnit_. “

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 'Does the thieves' guild have another access point?' Nope. But it does with a mod that I have. It's called 'Easy Thieves Guild Acces' on the Nexus. I altered the aesthetics of it a bit because,well, a latch would just be too simple. 
> 
> Next update: in one or two days most likely. :)


	5. Nails and hammers

“Well, that’s three… five more enemies made I suppose.” It didn’t feel good. Threatening people with what they loved most, stilly as those things could be, for money. Sure, the guild needed to be taken seriously but she did not want these types of jobs anymore if there was another way. She had showed she could be be an enforcer but she didn’t want to be one. 

She refused their money and told them to deliver it directly to the guild through the ‘usual means’ whatever those were. She came home empty-handed yet tired and drained. She had nothing to show for it. Nothing but the still unattached bolting for her doors and windows. Iona had been sent to the Bee and Barb again, presuming someone might return for another nightly talk. What was she doing, anyway? Sending away her housecarl for someone who might or might not stop by? She sighed and started attaching the locks and bolts to her door. As she knocked in the nails she tried to figure out why she was feeling so attached to the idea of joining this guild.  


BANG maybe just because it was less complicated than everything else on her mind  


BANG she wanted to live damnit, before she might die failing at her destiny  


BANG and a sense of family… maybe. Her own was so far away now.  


BANG “Mara?” And yes. Fine. His voice. His voice did something to her, when he said her name it felt… like the heat of walking from a blizzard into a warm tavern. She couldn’t believe she heard him even when he wasn’t there though. If that wasn’t a sign she was losing her mind she didn’t know what was.  


BANG of course the break-up could have something to do with it  


BANG but that was ages ago, nothing left to show for it but a slight dent at the base of her finger  


She lifted her hammer again when she heard. “ Is this a bad time, lass? ”  
Thank the divines, his voice hadn’t been imagined. She unbolted the one lock she had managed to attach and opened the door. “ Since when do you knock?”  
He bowed while looking up at her. “ I cannot just break in every time can I, dear Thane?”  


She rolled her eyes as he walked in, avoiding the nails and unattached pieces metal on the floor.  
He seemed on guard but did not lose his flair. “ Is all this for me? I’m honoured.”  
“ What can I say, I have learned not to trust you.”  
“ And yet here I am, once more in your house.”  
“ Again, you invited yourself. Mostly.”

She put down her hammer and turned to face him. With the conflicting feelings she’d had doing this job, she didn’t really feel like being near him. She couldn’t figure out if he was a bad influence on her when he was talking to her.

“ Job well done, lass. So well that they delivered the gold already. All three of them. Best of all you did it clean. I like that. Dumping bodies and keeping the guards quiet can be expensive. “  
She clenched her jaw and crossed her arms before leaning against the table and speaking again. “So that does happen? You do cover up murders?”  
“ We could if it were to happen. Maven has connections with us ànd the Dark Brotherhood. And she always another to pin the blame on.”  
She scoffed. “ Wonder why I haven’t been arrested yet then.”  
“ She doesn’t target big players like that. They either wind up working for her or…”  
“ Let me guess, they mysteriously go missing?”  
“ That is… known to happen indeed.”  


She rubbed her head. “ I don’t know if I want to do this.”  
“ Do ya mind clarifying what ‘this’ is?”  
“ I am… I have been using the weaknesses of those who have been friendly to me to threaten them. Not bandits, not undead, not dangerous people,… Look I get it. I do. They made a deal they have to face the consequences but I am no enforcer. I do not want these types of ‘jobs’ in the future. I live here now, I might adopt kids.” She swallowed. “It’s all easy until I realise the consequences. I have enough enemies here already.”  
“ You might adopt kids? Is this change of heart related to your marriage by any chance?”  
She shook her head and looked him straight in the eyes. “ You don’t get to change the topic, I am serious about this. “

He sighed. “You want to operate from the shadows instead? Or do you just want out altogether?”  
“ What do you have on offer that is not enforcing?.”  
“ Once whatever job Mercer might give you to prove yourself is done, you will get your jobs from Vex and Delvin. You choose the type of job you specialise in. Take Delvin’s Numbers jobs. They’re quite harmless, just altering some business ledgers. Maybe a few Bedlam Jobs, steal from whoever you want.” He noticed the glint in her eye and the small grin growing “ -not any Blackbriars-“ it fell again and she crossed her arms with squinted eyes glaring at him. “ It’s meant to show a message, remind cities what we are capable of. Steal whatever until they’ve heard us loud and clear.”  
“ I can steal from the arrogant skeevers among the city and leave the good and less well-off alone?”  
“ I don’t see why you shouldn’t. ”

She nodded. “What about Vex’s jobs?”  
“ She offers jobs like the one we started out with. Plant false evidence.”  
“ No.”  
He raised an eyebrow. “Lass…”  
“ I said no. Now I know I might be doing Maven’s dirty work, no way. If that hagraven wants false evidence planted to cover up for her murder buddies she can do it her goddamn self.”  
“ Then choose a burglary job. Stealing some item from a wealthy home in a city, no personal items. Just showy golden things that earn us good coin.”  
Silence fell as she thought it over. It sounded good, it sounded like… fun. But less harmful and invasive somehow.  
“ You still in?”  
“ Yeah.”  
“ You certain? ‘Cause if you don’t wanna do this, quit while you’re ahead. We don’t need anyone changing their mind halfway a mission.”  
“ I’m sure. What’s that?” She pointed at the bag he was holding.  
“ Part of the reason why you needed to be sure first. I think you'll find these quite useful.” He dropped armour on her table. It had belts, pockets and a tell-tale shine which revealed it had some sort of enchantment on it. She ran her hands over the smooth armour. It looked new, sleek. Brynjolf spoke up again. “Judging from how well you handled those shopkeepers, I'd say you've done more than simply prove yourself. We need people like you in our outfit.”  
“ Word is your outfit isn't doing well. I didn’t think it was that bad but when everyone keeps repeating it when first meeting me…”  
“We've run into a rough patch lately, but it's nothing to be concerned about. Tell you what. You keep making us coin and I'll worry about everything else. Fair enough?"”

She remained quiet for a few minutes. “No. I want to know what is going on before I get involved.”  
He sighed. “Tell you what, I get to ask you a question for every question you ask me. “  
“ Fine.”  
“ You get to ask first.”  
“… what if I refuse to reply to mine?”  
“ When one of us stops, the game stops and we move on.”  
“ Deal.”


	6. Questionable reputations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A few rounds of 'tell me yours I'll tell you mine' result in secrets getting spilled and Mara coming to a worrisome conclusion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't had time to write at all (and don't have now either but ey who needs sleep anyway right?) but as I said the comments are a pretty good motivator. ;) Thank you all so much for your comments, I will get back to them asap but now I gotta rush.

Brynjolf tried to sit on one of her chairs when she unclasped some buckles on her armour and started to walk downstairs. “ Is that an invitation, lass?”  
“ No. I have plenty of questions so I’m going to put on something comfortable. And if any of my things goes missing, I will know you have it so don’t even _think_ about it.”  
“ Thieves guild members don’t steal from each other.”  
“ Sure they don’t. Where did you put my necklace of Mara then, hm?”  
She could hear the pride in his voice as he spoke up again. “ You weren’t one of us _yet_.”

He looked up at the ceiling when he heard the familiar sound of armour falling to the ground. Not a good time to let his mind wander, not a good person to let it wander about either. She was a recruit and one who was not even certain that a thieves’ life was for her. She returned dressed in a rather shapeless black tunic, with trousers and a top. The fabric was unfamiliar to him. She had a blanket of some sorts draped around her like a cape and sat on the chair cross-legged. 

“ Me first, right? How come that the thieves guild is doing badly?”  
Brynjolf sighed and leaned back in his chair. “ We don’t know.”  
“ Well. That is the worst possible answer to that question. Do you get fewer jobs than you once did? Or…”  
“ Something doesn’t add up but we can’t put our finger on it. Each time I think we’ve reached a breakeven, Mercer angrily announces that we didn’t. Recruits may be holding back spoils… Look, we just need more capable people and a little bit of luck to get back to our glory days. I’m sure of it.”  
“ You sure you’ll get that? Luck? With the curse and all?”  
“ Oh no, lass. It’s my turn. Where did you get that from?” He gave a quick nod in her general direction.  
She laughed and looked down her own body before looking up at him again. “ Ehm. Good genes? Active lifestyle? What _are_ you talking about?”  
“ The clothes. The fabric looks different from any other I have seen before.”  
“ Oh. Well, haven’t you heard? Khajiit have wares if you have the coin. They call it silk. It’s soft and comfortable to sleep in. Really though? That was your first question? Nevermind. Your turn: the curse?”

“ It’s nonsense.”  
She saw the doubt in his eyes. “You’re not sure if it is though.”  
Anger flashed over his face the second she finished her sentence. “ Look, lass. If anyone had the kind of power to _curse_ us we would be long gone. The guild has been around for a long time, we’ve got decades worth of powerful enemies and we’re still alive and kickin’. Nocturnal hasn't even turned her back on us when her own _cowl_ was stolen, only on the leader itself. As long as she favours us we will keep our heads above water.”  
“ You’ve sure put a lot of thought into this for someone who doesn’t believe in curses.”  
He shrugged.

“ Why is your housecarl never here when I am? ”  
Mara smiled at the floor and fidgeted with one her enchanted rings. “ Iona hasn’t quite warmed up to me yet. I think I’m stressing her out. Not exactly your perfect thane am I? I hate to be called Thane, for one. She isn’t like my other housecarl who practically rolls her eyes at me when I do something stupid and calls me out on it. Iona seems so concerned and reverent. I don’t like the idea of having someone bound to serve me. So I dismiss her, force her to have some fun instead, away from what causes her stress. Which is me. I think.”  
“ If someone has chosen a life of servitude you don’t seem like the worst to serve.”  
She scoffed. “She doesn’t understand why I won’t have her protecting me, really fought me on it today. It was kind of a relief to hear her talk back for once. But what would she think if she found you here like this? Speaking of which. Your turn. ” Sometimes I really don’t know why I do what I do, she thought. But she didn’t say it. 

She looked him in the eyes again. He didn’t look at her with the usual glint of mischief. “Anyway… your turn. Delvin said you have a reputation. Don’t give me that look, it slipped. He clearly thought I knew all about it and tried to defend you. So tell me, what is your reputation exactly?”  
“ I’m not the right person to ask about what people say behind my back.”  
“ What do you think it might be?”  
He sighed. “I have my vices, lass. I steal, I lie, I flirt. It is a useful way to obtain information. “ He saw the flash of hurt across her face as she crossed her arms.  
“ Not that that is what I am doing now.”  
“ Of course you aren’t.” She rolled her eyes. “It doesn’t matter, I suppose. But go on, I can tell there is more.”  
“ I have had a… few lovers in my young years. Though those days have passed since the guild has been doing so badly. I’m sure many believe that I practice the Dibellan arts with Haelga as so many others do in this city. I don’t. Not that I’m no fan of Dibella, but Haelga has a rotten personality. Beautiful but… “ he shuddered. “And Vekel thinks I had a thing with Tonila. It’s absurd, I would not interefere with their relationship. Speaking of which… what is your current relationship status?”

“ Not married or living together with anyone but housecarls. These rings are all enchanted.“  
He leaned forward. “But that’s not the whole story is it?”  
“ You did not ask me for that, did you?” He looked into her eyes and raised an eyebrow so she leaned forward and spoke up. “ I’ll tell you what. I talk about mine in detail if you tell me yours. Of your heartbreaks and how many hearts you’ve broken -willingly or not. You sure you are up for sharing that Bynjolf?”  
He smiled and leaned back again. “Well lass, I suppose it is your turn then.”

“ Why did you really approach me at the market instead of anyone else?”  
“ You were a fresh face, I had seen you pass through a few times but never did get the chance to speak to you. Always talking, always rushing. Covered in dirt, blood, soaked by the rain. I may not have known who you were lass, but you _do_ stand out.  
“What is your current impression of me?”  
She laughed. “Are you going there, really?”  
“ Oh yes, I most definitely am.”  
“ I think you’re annoying in the way you seem to elicit information from me with such ease. It’s unsettling. Aside from that, I am not sure if I ought to trust you at all but yet here you are. In the meantime it can be hard telling the lies from the truth knowing I am sitting across a professional liar. So either you have been truthful to me the whole time, lying the whole time but I doubt that or I simply haven’t figured out your ‘tell’ yet. I presume the latter. “  
“ And…”  
“ And what?” She grinned at him. “If you want to know specific information you’ll have to ask specific questions, _‘lad’_.”  
He shook his head but seemed amused enough.

“Why do you really come visit me here? I cannot imagine you do this for every new recruit.”  
He crossed his arms and stopped looking at her. “ I don’t.”  
“ Why am I any different? Is it because I’m a Thane and more costly to lose than your average recruit? Cause I have power to make the guards look the other way? ”  
He looked up at her through his lashes. “ Why do you keep letting me inside of the house and put a second glass on the table? ” She opened her mouth and closed it again. A full minute of staring later, nobody had said a word.  
He stood up from his chair. “I can tell we’ve reached an impasse, lass. Come see us tomorrow, wear the armour. You’re meeting Mercer. ”  
“ How do I get in?”  
“ Cornerstone at the tomb. To the top right. It’s besides some thieves’ cant. You’ll find it just fine.”

He walked to the door and she had to keep herself from stopping him. From _forcing_ him to answer her question by answering his.  
“ You don’t have to leave yet.” Shit. That sounded a little too hopeful. “I’m sure your reputation won’t involve me so easily just because you’re here on a chair near me.”  
He licked his lower lip, bit on it and seemed to be thinking for a second. “ About that... I’m afraid it already does.” 

He reached for the door handle but she shot up and pushed him against the wall: “Oh no, you can’t just say that and leave. What the hell did you tell them?”  
He raised his hands but was far too calm and far too close. Her hand was still on his chest. She quickly removed it and tried to look angry. He just raised an eyebrow and grinned a little. Damnit.

“I didn’t say anything, lass. Sapphire saw me enter last time I was here, I was back late and they drew conclusions. I said nothing happened but I am not sure if they believed me.”  
Mara groaned. “Great. Wonderful. Exactly what my reputation needed on top of being an enforcer. Maven is gonna have a field day if she finds out about how badly people think of me now.”

His shoulders slumped a bit. “Would it really be _that_ bad if you had been sleeping with me?”  
“ YES! Because you have a reputation and I HATE getting punished for something I never even reaped the benefits of.”  
Brynjolf lifted his head and was clearly holding back a wider grin as Mara’s eyes widened. “ Not that I want to reap… oh for fuck’s sake. Just go.”  
She gestured at the door. 

“ I think I will stay a little longer if you don't mind.” He bent over and took some of the metal pieces off of the floor. “ You look like you could use some help with these and I would hate for an assassin to kill you before you can remove the guild’s… ‘curse’.”  
She sighed and wanted to yank the piece from his hands but just ended up grazing his hand instead and pulling away as if she had just touched a hot stove.   
She cursed under her breath and he just grabbed the hammer. Too late now to save her reputation anyway. It would be more suspicious if he snuck out in the middle of the night and if one of Maven’s goons saw.  
“ Fine. But I’m not paying. And I’m not spilling any more secrets tonight.” She pressed her eyes close when she had said that. “You take that one I take this one.”  
“ All right. “  
“ And you’re not sleeping in my bed tonight. I still have a bedroll you can use. Sleep here if you must. But you don’t get to go downstairs.”  
“ What about your precious ‘reputation’?”  
“ What about it?” 

She held the plate in place and looked at the hammer. He grabbed her hand and placed it a little differently so the nail was no longer bent in the wrong angle. "Hold it like that. We may be thieves but our own security should not be crooked, lass."  
She could practically feel the heat radiating of his body by how close he was beside her. She was sure she was imagining it... but hoped she wasn't. He put one nail between his lips and then swung the hammer at the nail he had carefully positioned at the door.

Four different types of locks later, he looked at her again. She hadn't said a word.  
" You've been quiet."  
" Hm? I'm just... tired."  
" We have some practice material at the guild if you want to practice lockpicking."  
" I think I'm pretty good at that already." 

He opened the door and saw Iona walking in the general direction of the home. She hadn't seen him.  
" Lass? Your housecarl seems to be on her way back." Mara instinctively rushed to slam the door shut, close the locks and push her body against it.  
A key being turned and a jamming sound followed. She couldn't look inside, Mara thanked her lucky starts that she had gotten thick curtains since Brynjolf's last visit.  
A knock followed. " Thane Mara? You there? "


	7. Our irreverent Thane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mara and Brynjolf almost get caught doing... nothing wrong? Then why are they so jittery...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Behold, who needs sleep and who needs a focus on school anyway, right? The new chapter.

The colour drained from her face as Mara heard Iona’s voice. She yelled back “Just a minute, Iona!” While gesturing towards the staircase at Brynjolf. He gave her a questioning look and mouthed ‘Downstairs?’ as Mara nodded heavily and mouthed back ‘stairs, left, my room, close door’. He seemed to get what she meant and crept down the stairs without much sound. Incredible how quiet he could be. When she heard the door close, Mara breathed out and turned back with her face towards the door. “ Her eyes darted in the direction of the stairs once more and she swallowed. 

Unbolting the locks and opening the door could have gone more swiftly but she took her time. Careful to shift her posture a little to pretend she was tired.  
“ Hi, what’s wrong? I didn’t expect you back until in a few days. I meant it when you said you needed a holiday?”  
“ Someone at the Bee and Bard said they noticed someone sneaking around the house yesterday and I needed to come check up on you.”  
Mara yawned. “Well… I did not get any uninvited guests today. And even if so, I have installed some additional protection tonight anyway.” 

Iona looked at the shiny new bolts on the door. “I can see that.” The worry and tension in Iona’s arms seemed to fade. “I am still concerned with your safety and that of your home my Th… Mara. This can be a dangerous town to newcomers and I am sworn to protect you. Please, allow me to live here again.”  
Mara sighed. “ All right. After your holiday.”  
Iona spoke up again. “But…”  
“No. You deserved some time off and trust me I can handle some thief. Iona, I’m a conjurer. Look.” Mara summoned her flame atronach and Iona took a step back. “I had heard such rumours but I have never seen someone actually conjure one before…”  
Mara felt guilty looking at Iona, at the genuine concern and anxiety in her eyes. She meant well. 

Mara crossed her arms and leaned back. “Iona?”  
“ Yes, my th…”  
“ Who told you they saw someone sneaking around? Not a Blackbriar by any chance?”  
“ Actually… I overheard someone speaking of it in a room beside mine. The voice did sound like Hemming’s.”  
Mara cursed under her breath and Iona looked confused. “Okay, looks like I will have to fill you in on a few things then. First of all: do not trust any of the Blackbriars as far as their gossip about me goes. Maven and I had a slight head-to-head not so long ago. Second: do not tell them anything about me. Is that understood?”  
Iona looked at her thane and her forehead furrowed. She was doubting. “ I _am_ sworn to carry your burdens…”  
“ This is a yes or no question, Iona. I need to know you will guard my secrets if you are to live in my home. You are allowed to say no. I won’t punish you for it I simply need to know.“  
“ That depends on the type of secret. “  
“ That is fair enough.” She couldn’t blame Iona for being a little suspicious after keeping her from the home a few nights. Nor could she keep hiding Brynjolf or her guild armour for her housecarl forever. “ Okay I’ll come get you at the Bee & Bard tomorrow and we can go get some alchemy ingredients together. Picking flowers, basically. Is that okay? Today is going to be rather busy. “

Iona’s mouth curved into a relieved smile. “Yes, that is all right my Thane. Thank you.”  
Mara closed the door behind her housecarl, exhaled loudly and relocked her door. She then rushed downstairs and into her bedroom. She couldn’t see anyone. “Brynjolf? Coast is clear.”  
Nothing. She checked beside the bed and opened the door of her closet. Nothing.  
“ Looking for me?” She spun around so fast that she managed to hurt her neck.  
“ Aw.. yeah. Thanks for that.” She rubbed her neck a little. “ Where did you come from? Didn’t I say to stay here?”

His grin was fading as he walked towards her. “I decided to hide somewhere you didn’t know in case you’d accidentally give it away with body language. You have a children’s room?”  
She went quiet. “Yes. I want to adopt a few kids I met on my travels. They’re living out on the street and…”

He slowly, as if to ask for permission, placed his thumbs on the back of her neck and tried to massage the base of it. “Aw, AUW that’s not actually… ok thàt is.” As soon as the worst part of the pain had faded she fully realised his hands were on her and she had her eyes closed. “Yeah that’s enough, thanks.”  
“Did it help?”  
“ It did. Thank you.” It still hurt, but less so. 

Brynjolf looked around her room and seemed to land his gaze on her safe. “Don’t even think about it.”  
He looked back at her. “As I said, thieves guild members don’t steal from each other.”  
“ My amulet?”  
He got it out of his pocket and dangled it in front of her. “ Consider this a peace offering.”  
“ Can it be considered that, if it was mine to start with?” He simpered but she held the amulet in her hand again and grazed the stone with her finger. She then put it around her neck.  
“ You do realise, this signifies to men you’re…”  
“ Available for marriage, sure, whatever. Strange Skyrim habits…. a necklace of all things…”  
“ You weren’t born here?”  
She looked up at him. “No, I’m from Cyrodil. Far away from home, I know.”  
“Why didn’t you stay there?”  
She shrugged. “Wanted to see something beyond it. And then there was that small thing about the kin of a dragon and all that.” He looked intruiged but she gave him a sad half-smile. “I’m oversharing again and no I am not spilling more secrets. Divines. You have a bad effect on me.”

He took a seat on the chair across her bed. “What did Iona have to say?”  
“ My favourite crime family in Riften has seen someone sneaking around my house. She overheard it. So they’re watching me pretty closely.”  
He leaned forward a bit, looking particularly concerned. “Dark brotherhood?”  
She scoffed. “ More likely Sapphire. The person was seen a day ago.”  
“Now what is the plan? You don’t want me sneaking out anymore I reckon?”  
She dropped herself on her bed, flinched because her neck still hurt and rubbed her temples. “I don’t know what I want. There’s a bedroll if you want to sleep here in that chest over there.” She pointed in the general direction of a desk but way too high. “Lay on the floor of the kids’ room and lock it then. For the time being it’s abandoned anyway. Or go, I’m sure they’re missing you at the guild. Wouldn’t want them barging in thinking I’ve killed or kidnapped you.”  
“ They don’t know where I am.”

Mara scoffed and propped herself up on the bed a little. “I doubt that.”  
“ You think Maven knows about our…”  
“ Our?”  
He hesitated. “About me visiting you from time to time? About you joining?”  
She dropped herself again. Damnit. Neck. Aw. “Probably both. That conniving hagraven has eyes and ears everywhere.”  
He sighed and sat beside her on the bed, leaving some distance between their bodies. He lifted her up by the shoulders and massaged her neck again. She decided to let him and revel in it.  
“ Do you want me to stay?”  
“ Here? In my bed? No.” She was not going to be another benchmark.  
“ I mean in your house.” He sounded almost uncharacteristically serious.  
“ I don’t mind. You can choose.”  
She could hear the amusement in his voice when he announced “Does this mean our irreverent Thane trusts me?”  
"Perhaps."

She instinctively put her hand on his to make him stop the massage and they both froze. She had no clue what to do next. He didn't move away and she didn't want to either. And she couldn't gauge what he was thinking from his expression either considering that he was behind her. She couldn't hear him breathing anymore. Then she felt his fingers moving to intertwine with hers and she swallowed, allowing her fingers to part for a second until she snapped out of it and got up out of the bed. Rubbing her hand on the place at her neck where his was before, she looked at him.

“ Maybe you should… “  
“ Yeah. I wasn’t supposed to be down here anyway. I’ll … leave.” She nodded and ignored the pang of disappointment knotting in her chest. He got up from the bed. No, this was for the best.  
But she still had to say something, anything. “And then… I’ll come see you after I’ve had some sleep.”  
“ Don’t forget the armour. You’re one of us now, lass.”  
“ And I’m meeting the great guild leader soon.”  
Both their tones and their smiles seemed a little less genuine after what had happened. Even he seemed to have gotten a little more quiet and a little more serious. He walked up the stairs with her close behind him. He unlocked the bolts and was about to open the door when she spoke up again.

“ Brynjolf? Thanks. For… the armour, helping with the locks, hiding away.”  
“ It’s all right, lass. See you later today.”  
She nodded and held open the door as he left, making sure to stand in the door opening as visibly as possible. That way nobody would think he had stolen from her, if anyone did see him at the ungodly hour at all.  
Maybe it wasn’t _that_ bad if people drew wrong conclusions. She gave him a once-over as he left. 

As soon as she had redone all of the locks, her smile fell entirely. She pushed her body against the closed door, only to slide down until she reached the floor. She looked at her hands and took off the rings on her left hand, looking at the only ring-shaped dent that still showed at the base of her ring finger. She leaned the back of her head against the door, as she knotted her hand in her hair ‘What am I getting myself into?’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mara is starting to realise some things. Next one will be up in 3 days at the earliest, due to deadlines. But as long as I get to read people want more I'll keep updating as soon as I can. :)


	8. You don’t want me to answer that question

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who thinks Mara is going to be jumping for joy to hit Goldenglow? No? No one?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for the comments and I AM SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG. I'll try to update faster again.

She had been been feeling up stones for a good 5 minutes now, hissing to herself. “Join the Thieves guild he said, easy to find he said.” Then she felt a dent in the stone underneath her fingertips, invisible from a distance. Hm. Nobody nearby... she waited. Listened for five minutes. When she finally pressed down the stone, it moved aside with a slight rumbling noise and showed a small opening with a latch at the bottom. As she stepped inside, triggering a pressure plate, the stone moved back.  
“ Well… good thing I’m not scared of small enclosed spaces.” She crouched in the darkness and cast magelight. Under the bright wispy orb the latch appeared. “Gotcha.”

She climbed down and jumped the final part. She stuck the landing, mostly anyway, only to end up standing in front of a locked door. Fantastic. Cursing under her breath she unclasped some buckles to find a lockpick. He could have told her about this. Brynjolf… the knot in her stomach hadn’t dissapeared yet. As soon as the door swung open, she found another door. This one was already open and a familiar figure was leaning against the frame.  
“ Hi lass, glad you could join us today.”  
She crossed her arms and gave him a smile so sweet that it was obviously fake. “So nice of you to tell me about the locked door.”  
“ I did tell you could train your lockpicking skills here, didn’t I? And you told me ya had it covered.”  
“ I didn’t know I had to bring lockpicks.”  
“ Any thief worth the name always has several on ‘em.”  
She shook her head slightly. Insufferable. After he returned from locking the doors again, he gave her a one-over.  
“ You ain’t wearing our outfit, lass.”

“ Aren’t I?” With a fluid motion she opened the clasps of her cloak and revealed the thieves guild’s leather armour. Top buckles unclasped and revealing some cleavage. His eyes immediately darted down to her chest and then immediately back up to her eyes.  
“ Looks like you forgot to close that, lass.”  
“ I don’t know, some masterful thief told me that flirting helps to obtain information. And ehm...” She put her elbow on his shoulder, arm outstretched, while she leaned in. “I have certain assets you don’t.”  
He barely flinched but she could tell he was holding back a smile. “ I would appreciate it if you wouldn’t attempt such a thing with our guild master.”  
“ Hm. What if he is holding information back about the vault? I may be able to sway him to tell me.”  
“ I doubt he’ll be your type, lass.”  
“ Hm-mm… and who would my type be then, ‘lad’?” She passed him, bumping her shoulder against his arm as she did, in the direction of the chatter. He pulled the hood of her armour down and walked beside her. “ You know you don’t want me to answer that question.”  
She could swear she felt him graze his fingers against her gloved hand and swallowed.  
“ Follow me. “ Mara followed closely behind him to an area that looked unfamiliar.  
“ This is not the ragged flagon anymore. I didn’t know there was more.”  
“ The thieves’ guild is more than a run-down bar, lass. We’re headed for Mercer directly. You’ll have time for chitchat afterwards.”

Water, presumably sewer water, was cascading down from the walls. Easily mistaken for waterfalls if the water hadn’t been so blurry and discoloured. Walkways made out of wooden planks and cobblestone arches met in the middle. She noticed a figure in the center circle. Hands clasped behind his back.  
Brynjolf seemed to be heading straight towards him.  
“ Mercer? This is the one I was talking about… our new recruit.”  
“This better not be another waste of the Guild's resources, Brynjolf. “  
Mara cleared her throat. “I’m right here you know.” 

Mercer turned towards her, as did Brynjolf. The guild leader lifted his chin in an authoritarian manner. Looking down at her. She maintained eye contact throughout but crossed her arms.  
“The name’s Mara, by the way.”  
He sounded thoroughly bored when he spoke again. “ Before we continue, I want to make one thing perfectly clear. If you play by the rules, you walk away rich. You break the rules and you lose your share. No debates, no discussion... you do what we say, when we say. Do I make myself clear?”  
She gritted her teeth. That sounded like a threat. She glanced over at Brynjolf and read in his eyes what he hoped she’d answer. Just lay low.

“ Yes, I understand what you want.” But I will not be your lapdog. His entire demeanour reeked of an arrogance that revealed that he considered others expandable. She didn’t trust this man. But Brynjolf seemed to.  
“ Then I suggest we put your expertise to the test.” There was something about his sudden slight smile and the amusement in his voice that alarmed her. But it was Brynjolf who spoke next.  
"Wait a moment, you're not talking about Goldenglow, are you? Even our little Vex couldn't get in."  
She bit her tongue when Mercer and Brynjolf once more started speaking to each other as if she wasn’t even there.  
"You claim this recruit possesses an aptitude for our line of work. If so, let her prove it. Goldenglow Estate is critically important to one of our largest clients. However, the owner has suddenly decided to take matters into his own hands and shut us out. He needs to be taught a lesson. Brynjolf will provide you with the details." Mercer turned around when Brynjolf lunged forward and grabbed his shoulder. "Aren't you forgetting something?"

"Hm? Oh, yes. Since Brynjolf assures me you'll be nothing but a benefit to us, you're in. Welcome to the Thieves Guild." The bored, monotonous voice again, as if he had done this a million times before and had no expectation of her to last longer than a day.  
Mercer walked away to a desk against the wall and an empty trophy cupboard. Wonderful.  
“ Welcome to the family, lass. I'm expecting you to make us a lot of coin, so don't disappoint me."  
“ Yeah sure, cut it out. You looked pissed off. What is going on, what is this Goldenglow job?”  
Brynjolf side-glanced at Mercer and she noticed he kept his distance from her more than usual. 

"Goldenglow Estate is a bee farm; they raise the wretched little things for honey. It's owned by some smart-mouth wood elf named Aringoth. We need you to teach him a lesson by burning down three of the estate's hives and clearing out the safe in the main house."  
She raised an eyebrow and started counting on her fingers. “Okay, first of all we all are smart-mouths here. Except wannabe-alpha over there, who clearly has a superiority complex to the extent that he feels he does not need to be clever. “ Brynjolf frowned dissaprovingly. She could not understand why he seemed to be so loyal to him but she continued. “Second of all, those wretched little things make sure I can have both honey and fruit every morning. So I will not be burning down anything. Not an enforcer, remember? And third… A meadery? ‘one of our largest clients’? That better isn’t Maven.”  
“ It is.”  
“ I’m out.”

Mara walked in the general direction of where she came from when Brynjolf grabbed her by the arm and hissed ‘come with me’.  
She yanked her arm back. “ Why would I?” Then she saw the look in his eyes, he looked concerned rather than angry. She sighed and gestured at him to lead the way.

He led her to a separate room and closed the door.  
“Seriously Brynjolf, all I asked was not to work for Maven. And that’s disregarding the alarmed way you just spoke to Mercer, you already sent in Vex and she couldn’t do it? How do I know he isn’t just trying to get rid of me fast?“  
“ I wouldn’t allow that.”  
She crossed her arms and sat down on a chair, not facing him. “Last time I checked, you’re not in charge here. If I fail my reputation as a thane takes a serious dent, how the hell do I know that’s not exactly what she wants? How do I know your precious guild leader isn’t in cahoots with her?”  
He knelt in front of her. “ If it were, you reckon they’d have sent Vex first? Or that she wouldn’t have started rumours? Besides, the hood covers your face, lass. Not to mention… this way, if she plans something bad at least you’ll know and might be able to ensure fewer casualties.”  
She swallowed. “You know, I can tell when you’re trying to manipulate me. I don’t know if I appreciate it.”

“ Have I told you a lie yet, lass?”  
She sneered at him. “ You have evaded the full truth before. I can tell you’re holding back why you want me to do this so bad. So spit it out.”  
“ Goldenglow Estate brought in a mountain of gold for the Guild. You could almost call it our sweetest deal. Then out of the clear blue, Aringoth stops sending us our cut. Mercer was... well, angry to put it kindly. So we send in Vex and find out he's hired a bunch of mercenaries to guard the place. We need the coin to keep the guild afloat.“  
She raised an eyebrow. “Mercenaries? Not Riften guards?”  
"Aye. Aringoth sent the city guard packing and fortified the entire island. In fact, Vex barely made it out of there alive. You should talk to her about it before you go."

She leaned backwards, looking down at him. “There’s more to it than just that.”  
He remained quiet and no longer looked her in the eye for a few minutes.  
“ I don’t have forever Brynjolf. Tell me and I’ll take on this job.”  
He cursed under his breath before he looked up at her again. “ She will stop trying to kill you. She will leave you be.”  
“ I can look after myself. I’ll keep my word and do Goldenglow but.. I am not that easy to kill.”  
“ She won’t stop. Either you’ll be forced to move and the thrill of the nightly chase you said you wanted is gone or you’ll wind up dead.”  
“ Unless I work for her.”  
He nodded. 

“I’ll steal this for her. I’ll break two beehives with magic but I won’t burn the bees.”  
“ Those hives are built like small fortresses to resist the weather, lass. Fire is their one weakness. Besides, nothing tells the people of Riften we means business better than a huge column of smoke."  
“ My magic is not ‘the weather’. I’ll get the bees out. I won’t kill unless my life is threatened”  
“ Maven prefers that Aringoth remains alive anyway. But if he tries to stop you from getting the job done, you can kill him. The Guild has a lot riding on this.”  
She leaned in. “Let’s get one thing straight, back where I’m from I heard tales of the Thieves Guild that didn’t kill except out of self-defense. If I hear you say something like that once too often I might just hope for this place to go down.”  
“ Good thing we are no hitmen.”

“ Exactly. You’d do good remembering that. I’ll manage to get out without killing him one way or another… but I won’t do any of it because I’m scared of her. If she plans one too many hits on me, she’ll be the one who has to watch her back. Don’t think that’s beyond me. By the sound of it, I’d be saving a lot of people if I did it.”  
“ Then why are taking the job? It’s not ‘cause you promised me.”  
She got up off of the chair and stood up, so he did too. “ You know you don’t want me to answer that question.”  
Grazing his fingers with hers again, she moved in the direction of the door. Off to see Vex.

She could feel his eyes on her when she marched over to the white-haired woman.  
“ Hey Vex, I heard you ran into trouble at Goldenglow.”  
She looked pissed off, the way Mara imagined she had looked upon her return to Riften after the failed mission. "Hmph, yeah I did. That wood elf s'wit... he's a lot smarter than I expected. Can you believe that fetcher had more than tripled the guard? There must be eight of them in there. It was like he was daring us to come and get him."  
“ Any tips to get me in there?”  
“ You got the job now?”  
“ Yeah, trust me I’m not happy about it either.”  
“Well, there's an old sewer tunnel that dumps into the lake on the northwest side of the island. That's how I slipped in there. Should still be unguarded."

When she readied herself to leave, she heard Brynjolf’s voice behind her. “Hey, lass.”  
She turned around to face him. “Yes?”  
“ You watch yourself on that island. Those mercenaries don't take prisoners."  
“ You almost sound like you care, Bryn. Careful. Mercer might overhear. I noticed you are trying very hard to look ‘professional’ in front of him."  
" I'm only..."  
" Not now. Not here." She finished putting her hair in a bun and put on her mantle again before leaving without another glance at him. Off to Goldenglow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I mean they're not *fighting* but Mara is not exactly ecstatic right now. But he knows that too.


	9. Her people

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tensions run high when an exhausted Mara returns home from Goldenglow. Perhaps she should have just closed the door on him... 
> 
> Could've, would've, should've. If only hearing her name in his voice hadn't convinced her again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was _hard_ to write. I spent more hours on this than I have on the past three chapters combined and rewrote entire pages. So I'm sorry it took a few days but BEHOLD. Hope you enjoy it and thanks again for the comments. They keep me going. :)

She stumbled into her home and dropped the contents of her bag on the floor before touching the gash on her cheek. Still bleeding… of course. But it didn’t seem too deep. Given the sheer amount of guards it seemed like a miracle she had managed to get out at all. Especially without killing any guards... luck seemed to have been on her side. Her head hurt and the knot in her stomach hadn’t untangled yet. Doing Maven’s bidding felt dirty.

\---  
_She had thwarted the guards but hadn’t been able to go without detection entirely. As soon as she entered the room with the safe, she had found Aringoth beside it._  
“Worthless mercenaries. I didn't think Maven or Mercer would allow me to get away with this, but I had little choice."  
“I just want the key to your safe.”  
“ I can't. If I do, I may as well cut my own throat.”  
“ What makes you think I won’t?”  
“ Fine. Take it! Once the new owner finds out I gave in, I'm as good as dead anyway.” He tossed the key in her direction and she caught it with ease.  
“ New owner? What are you talking about?”  
“I've already said too much. I gave you what you came here for, now go. Leave me in peace."  
“ You have pissed off the wrong people. The only reason you’re still alive is because I did not feel the need the kill you. Think that through and leave this place. Tonight. You know what happens to those who cross Maven… she’ll talk or torture you out of your secrets and after nobody will be able to prove anything when your body is found. Run.”  
He had swallowed and nodded. But his eye kept darting to the door. Mara remembered when she came upon the Serpent Stone. She had no idea what it would do and she felt curious. But the moment she pledged herself to it, she knew. The paralysis effect had taken effect before the guards could be alerted. She wouldn’t take a life only to appease Maven but she couldn’t risk turning his back to him either. She then fed him some paralysis potion to lengthen the effect.  
She whispered to him as soon as he had collapsed on the floor. “ I know you can still hear me. You’ll be able to move again when I’m out of here, might feel sick but it won’t kill you. I want you to know that Maven gave permission to murder you if I wished. Take my advice. Run. I’ll leave you some money in the safe for your escape. Build a new life, change your name. Or her assassins will find you. And otherwise I will.”   
\---

She had left him 500 septims in the vault and had taken the deed. Some thief she was... but it should be enough for him to make his escape. The enemy of your enemy… The gash was caused by one attentive guard noticing her working her magic to break some of the beehives in two. She had gotten lucky, the metal had only grazed her skin and she lost the man in the chase after.  
She inspected the deed… a strange symbol on it seemed to be the mark of the new owner. No name. Hm. She wondered how powerful this anonymous buyer had to be to make Aringoth risk the wrath of first-class diplomat meets crime boss Maven herself. Why this buyer had purchased Goldenglow and their animosity towards the Guild was a mystery to her. But her best guess was that someone else was simply done with Maven’s reign. 

She looked in the mirror and winced as she poured the disinfectant on the wound. Then her healing magic did its work until her skin had closed perfectly. No scarring, so it hadn't been too deep. Good. She walked downstairs and peeled off her leather armour. At least that was still whole. It was still dark outside, but dawn would break soon.  
Then she heard the knock on her door and made her way back upstairs. She could guess who it would be. She grabbed a book from her shelf and shoved the deed between it.

“ Who is it?”  
“ Me.”  
Him. 

She opened the door but rather than inviting him in, she shoved the book against his chest.  
“ There you go. Everything’s in there. Now leave me be.”  
“ Lass…”  
His pleading look made the knot in her in her stomach feel a little bit heavier still.  
“ I’m tired and not in the mood to talk to you at the moment. Come back tomorrow.”  
“ Won’t Iona have returned by then?”  
She groaned and buried her face in her hands. Right. Probably.  
He continued. “ I only need 15 minutes, Mara.”  
No lass. No thane. Her name. In the most solemn tone she had ever heard him speak since he had revealed that he worried for her life.  
“ Fine.” She opened the door and allowed him inside her home once more. In the light of the hearthfire she could see how concerned he looked. Creased brow, no sly smile. As soon as she had closed the door she crossed her arms and leaned back against it. Waiting for him to speak.  
“ I’m glad you’re alright.”  
“ Am I? ‘Cause I’ve made more questionable decisions in the past week than I have in the entire month before. And for me that’s saying something.”

“ The guild members were already talking, if Mercer’d think that I got you in for the wrong reasons he would never take you seriously. I had to be all business.”  
She scoffed “ First of all, you keeping your distance like that will only seem more suspicious after those rumours. And only thing worse than a couple in the guild would logically be a disfunctional one. Secondly … please don’t tell me that you believe he took me seriously. That place was riddled with armed guards and after Vex’ visit he knew that. Sending me out there without backup… I believe he wanted to get rid of me.”  
“ Doubtful. Your reputation as a Thane precedes you. And as a dragonb…”  
She quinted her eyes at him when she cut him off. “I did not join to be the Guild's attack force, Brynjolf. Or Maven’s employee. If he expected me to take out all of those guards, who were just doing their job by protecting someone’s good, maybe he should join the guild with the Dark Brotherhood and call it a day. Our dear Aringoth referred to both Mercer and Maven before he said that he was as good as dead if I took the contents of that safe.”

Brynjolf looked over the documents she had hidden in the book. “ Aringoth sold Goldenglow? What's that idiot thinking? He has no idea the extent of Maven's fury when she's been cut out of a deal, but I'm certain he'll find out. If only the parchment had the buyer's name instead of this odd symbol. Any idea what that might be?"  
“ No idea. He wasn’t capable of speaking when I left him.”  
Brynjolf frowned at her, gauging whether that meant she had killed him after all.  
“ Well, I'll check my sources and speak to Mercer.”  
She rolled her eyes. “ Yeah you go do that.”  
“ Is Aringoth still alive?”

She shrugged while she crossed her arms. “I don’t know if I should trust Mercer’s lapdog with that information.”  
He clenched his jaw and squinted his eyes while he closed the book with a clap and tossed it on the table. He made his way towards the door, to her. “ That’s what you wanna throw at me? _Mercer’s lapdog?_ ”  
She bounced herself off of the door, standing tall with her shoulders back and her chin up.“ Yes. You couldn’t even talk plainly in front of him to me, too concerned about what he’d think.”  
“ He would kick you out of the guild otherwise! Or keep you around as an errand girl. You wouldn’t have been able to make a difference for the guild like that, lass.”  
“ You think I want to risk my life and reputation for a guild that sends me on a suicide mission? Hm? Besides, if you simply liking me would be enough to warrant that kind of decision from him maybe he’s the reason your numbers are dwindling, that the guild is failing. “  
“ He’s still our guild master.” Brynjolf was hissing at her. “He has stood with the guild since we were still busy playing tag and chasing after butterflies.”  
“ My days of needing someone else’s approval are behind me. I can't afford to care about people who want me gone. If he doesn’t want me there I’ll gladly walk out. ”  
“ _I_ don’t want you to get kicked out, damnit!”  
“ Then either you ought to stop acting so high and mighty when he’s near or _only_ speak to me as just another recruit. Those are your options. I have enough complicated matters to attend to. I refuse to let this be one of them, I can’t afford another complicating and muddy alliance.”

She realised how close they were to each other but refused to take a step back. And his eyes hadn’t left hers ever since the conversation had gotten heated.  
“ As you wish. I would gladly leave our renowned thane and dragonborn alone." He bowed before her but his voice was icy. "... but you’re in front of the door, woman.”  
“ Oh no ‘lass’ this time? You’re not leaving yet. I want to know which option it’s gonna be.”  
He walked forward until her back was against the door, and slammed his two hands beside her head. She didn't flinch. They were staring each other down, but neither of them had looked away after a good ten seconds.  
“ Remember your place in the guild. You’re just a recruit. “  
She scoffed and cocked her head to the side. "Come on Brynjolf... we both know I’m not.”  
“ I owe it to the guild to choose our leader over you.”  
“ I’m not stopping you from doing that.”  
He narrowed his eyes but didn't speak. So she did.  
“By the way… would you behave like this in the cistern, hm?” 

He paused.  
“I would.”

"Hm..." She reached for his upper arm and leaned her head back against the door, looking up so she could keep eye contact with him. “ Then would you also allow me to behave like ‘ _this_ at the cistern?”   
He allowed her to pull him closer when she grabbed his upper arm. His arms bent as he got closer. If he had been trying to look threatening, he had forgotten all about it now. He swallowed, closed his eyes and leaned his forehead against hers for a second before he took a step back and opened them again.  
“No.” The look in his eyes mirrored the regret she saw when she had confronted him at the ragged flagon.  
“ I won’t.” 

She swallowed and nodded. “Strictly professional it is. What’s my next mission?”  
“ Mercer said Maven would want to speak to you if you’d pull it off. She asked for you by name. And that I would have to smooth things over with her if you didn’t.” She nodded. Disappointment was setting in. She couldn’t care less right about Maven… the wringing in her chest wasn’t there because of that woman. But she decided to pretend that it was. It was easier.   
“ Will I come out of there alive?”  
“ If it was like that she wouldn't be asking for you, she'd be calling on the Dark Brotherhood. It's just business."  
“ What does Maven want from me?”  
“ That's between you and Maven. Don't worry about it. Maven's business dealings usually involve quite a bit of gold for her people.” 

Mara shivered. She was now one of ‘ _her people_ ’. At least she was the reason Aringoth and his guards were still alive. Might make an escape. Silver linings...   
“ You should leave. I now have _two_ important appointments tomorrow.”  
He still looked torn as he walked to the door. Sad eyes, shoulders slumped. All the anger, the strength from before had evaporated with his 'no'. She gathered the courage she had left when his back was turned to her to speak again.

“ I suggest you don’t stop by tonight. I’ll be at the guild whenever job she wants me to do is done. Or the day after.”  
“ Mara… it doesn’t have to be like this.”  
“ I refuse to be anyone’s dirty little secret. Or feel like it. I’ll be okay, just give me some time.”  
He handed her a key. “This is for the best. Right?”  
She gave him a sad little smile and shrugged. “You’re not good for my reputation either. And at least we’re not in too deep for this to be difficult. I’ll just be a recruit, and you my handler. Don’t worry… I’ll still try to help save this branch of the Thieves’ guild.”  
He nodded and turned his head. 

She didn’t watch him this time, some things you can’t talk about when the sun rises. She just closed the door and locked it. But she felt a little colder, even when she slipped underneath her sheets. 

All alone in the darkness, she didn't feel as sure that she had done the right thing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “This is for the best. Right?”
> 
> They're dancing on a fine line. I like to imagine what I would have said if I had been there as the angel (or devil) on her shoulder. Things may have panned out differently had she had someone to give a second opinion nearby.
> 
> What would you have advised her?


	10. Colourful company

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mara struggles to shake off even the idea of Brynjolf and starts another kind of partnership.

With her hair still damp, Mara splashed cold water onto her face. She tried hard not to think back of when Brynjolf had poured water into her cupped hands. But try not to think of it and there it is. Her eyes were drawn to the necklace of Mara on her bedside table she remembered Brynjolf dangling it in front of her, as ‘a peace offering’. 

She pulled out leather armour which offered less support than her new set, but which she could be seen in without being linked to the guild instantly. It was short-sleeved and showed enough cleavage to distract an average inn-goer from whatever she was saying. Perhaps it’d work on Maven’s security detail as well. She might as well try, get some use out of it. She never did intend to fight in it anyway. Leather arm braces and her cutlass were up next. Then she pinned her hair up and put on her necklace of Mara again. The irony of her being named after a goddess of love… what a joke. She was going to look unignorable to Maven and anyone else who saw her. 

She eyed the locks on her door before pulling it open and shook her head. Everything somehow reminded her just a little too much of a certain rogue. On days like these she missed those she left behind to put her feet back on solid ground. But for now, she was on her own; “Get a grip, nothing even happened.” When she headed for the Bee and Barb she made a quick stop to check the market stalls. One was abandoned. Figures. She shook her head and carried on inside. Iona was seated at a table with the best view on the door. That couldn’t be a coincidence.  
Mara felt Keerava’s venomous stare on her and mouthed ‘just a second’ to Iona before she walked over to the barkeep. 

“ This time you owe me, Thane.” Mara had never heard anyone spit out her title quite like that before and had to supress a smile.  
“ I know Keerava. Just tell me how much is on my tab.”  
Keereva grabbed a ledger and opened it. “Iona has been staying here for four days, 25 septims a night, 30 for food and drinks.”  
Mara put down a bag in front of her. “300 septims, should cover the bill.”  
The argonian’s eyes widened.  
“For the record, yes I can count, I know that’s too much.”

Keerava squinted her eyes. “Why?”  
The thane shrugged. “I won’t be reminding you to pay and then not pay myself. I was glad you could provide Iona with a good place to stay the past few days. And I know the inn is suffering with Maven raising the price on her mead and the war going on.”  
The woman kept looking at her incredulously. “What’s in it for you?”  
Mara shook her head. “Nothing. You should take the guild seriously but I wouldn’t want you to get shut down. Where else would my housecarl stay when I need the house to myself?”  
Her look softened as she put the money behind the counter. “ Maven Black-Briar’s guard has been asking around about your whereabouts.”  
Mara nodded. “I figured as much. It’s fine. I’m meeting with her soon. But I have other plans fist.” 

She placed an empty bottle on the bar. “I don’t know what Iona’s favourite drink is but you might. Whatever it is, fill this bottle with it. I’m taking her on a trip.”  
Keerava raised her eyebrows and looked down at her necklace. “No, not like that. Not that she isn’t… I’m interested in someone else. Sort of. It’s complicated.”  
“ Then you might want to pocket that necklace.”  
Mara leaned on the counter while keerava prepared a drink and put it in the bottle. “It doesn’t mean anything to me. I’m not exactly from…”  
“ Look, you paid me enough but I don’t care enough to listen to anyone’s personal issues. We’ve got a temple of Mara for that.”

Mara supressed a smile once more. She put her hand over the counter, outstretched. Rather than taking it, Keerava pushed the bottle into it. The thane leaned back but spoke again.  
“I’m Mara by the way. And glad to see someone who doesn’t feel the need to try and sway me into liking them with honeyed words. One more thing… I overheard something last time I was here before we ehm. Fought. You throw a decent punch by the way. But ehm did you really tell Brynjolf to go jump off the pier?”  
“ Damn right I did. “  
Mara smiled and turned to Iona’s table. She was tapping her finger on the table impatiently and no longer looking at her. Her gaze had shifted to Marcurio, but it was not per se a look of interest.  
“ We’re heading out, come on.” Iona grabbed her bag and walked out the door with her. 

“Where are we going my thane?”  
“ My name’s Mara. I’m going to keep correcting you Iona so you might as well knock it off. We’re just heading out for some random ingredients for my potions. A walk more or less. We need to talk.”  
Iona tensed up a little. Mara stopped and turned around, nearly making Iona bump against her.  
“ Please. Relax. I’m not going to make you lose your assignment or harm you. So breathe. “  
“ Why are we headed out if you don’t need anything.”  
“ Because this is Riften. Everyone’s listening in on everyone here.”  
Iona nodded and seemed to ease up a little. 

After a while of walking in silence, picking a bunch of flowers, a bandit jumped out at them. Iona drew her blade without missing a beat but Mara raised her arm at her, like a mother trying to make sure her child stayed behind her.  
“ You picked a bad time to get lost, girls...”  
Mara outstretched her hand. “ I usually straight-up kill the lot of you if you actually attack but for this once I’m just going to assume you’re not a complete idiot. The one behind me is extremely skilled with that weapon she’s holding. I am skilled with mine too, don’t let my dress choice fool you.”  
“ Shut it lady, you'll be so much easier to rob when you're dead! “

Mara casted an ice spike and wedged it into his shoulder, forcing him to drop his blade and scream loudly.  
“ You know, conjurers don’t tend to conjur up a warm bed. What we do conjur…” Mara summoned a flame atronach. “ Last chance to run.”  
The bandit nearly stumbled before he ran away as fast as he could.  
“ Why did you let him go?”  
Mara shrugged. “ Not all bandits actually follow up on their threats, some of them are just opportunists. And I don’t take pleasure in killing and he stood no chance against the both of us.”  
Iona looked at the man running while clutching his shoulder and looked back at Mara and then at her atronach.  
“ You must be a powerful mage to do that.” She lifted her head to the flaming figure that was twirling around in its usual manner.  
Mara shrugged. “ I am also only proficient with one weapon, a one-handed blade. I’ll bet you are better than me at that. Everyone has their skills.”  
Iona gathered the flowers that had fallen out of her bag when she had drawn her weapon and Mara looked around to see if she couldn’t find a clearing off the road.  
“ Come on, I want to head off the road a bit. Lower the chances on someone finding us and listening in.”  
Iona mumbled “ Are you always this paranoid?” before her eyes widened, likely realising she said that out loud.  
Mara turned around with a grin. “ About time you learn to speak your mind. But we’re ‘still going to try and find a clearing. ”

It didn’t take them long to do so. Mara put down her flower bags and sat down on a massive rock, with Iona beside it, leaning against a tree trunk. Then she grabbed the bottle handed to her by Keerava and the muffins, sweet rolls and taffy. “First thing you need to know about me, I’ve got a bit of a sweet tooth. Take as many as you want. I have more at home.”  
Iona grabbed a muffin and bit down on it. Then Mara handed her the bottle. “ This one’s all yours, I asked Keerava to fill it with your favourite drink. I’ve got my own mead… not by the Black-Briars. Anyway, hope your dink is alcoholic. You might need it.”  
Iona’s mouth was still half-stuffed with muffin when she spoke up; “ Is this where I find out you are a necromancer, too?”  
Mara scoffed. “No, I’m no necromancer. But I do keep… colourful company.”  
“ Brynjolf, or so I’ve heard.”  
Mara sighed and leaned back. “News travels fast.”  
“ With all due respect, he’s bad news.”  
“ I’m part of the guild. As is he.”

Iona swallowed and leaned forward. “May I be so blunt to ask you which one?”  
“ The thieves one.”  
Iona exhaled loudly an leaned back again. “Thank the divines.”  
“ What did you think?”  
“ The Dark Brotherhood of course.”  
Mara frowned. That would explain the 'killing is bad but not unsolvable' thing... “ You think Brynjolf is one of them?”  
She shrugged. “ I try to steer clear from him, how would I know?”  
Mara crossed her arms. “Anyway. You may know Maven truly is the one who runs Riften.”  
Iona nodded. “ Everyone but the jarl does.”  
“ Well, we don’t get along. Which is a bit of an issue, seeing as she’s one of the primary benefactors of both the Thieves guild and the murder buddies. She’s sent an assassin after me, spies to keep an eye on me, has been trying to get rid of me….”  
“ And yet you do not wish my protection? Even when I find out people are skulking around Honeyside?” Iona looked properly judgemental now.  
“ I know who was skulking around, she’s no threat. And I wanted some time alone.”  
“ Not thàt alone.” Iona looked annoyed.  
“ We’re… “

“ It is none of my business. I can easily make myself scarce without being cooped up in the Bee an Barb entire days if you so wish.”  
Mara nodded. “ It’s not just that though. I’ll admit… I take some time to trust people. Brynjolf and my interests so far lined up. He’d be shooting an arrow into his own foot if he’d betray me. “ And she melted at his voice but she was going to go ahead and not mention that little fact. “But I need to know I can trust you with everything. With every time I put on the guild attire, that news cannot leave our home. Every time he or anyone else comes around, each time a courier stops by, every time I return home bruised up or create a dubious potion… what is said at home needs to stay there unless explicitly stated otherwise. Especially with Maven and her offspring waiting for a chance to lunge at my throat. I wanted to come clean to you because you deserve as much. But in order to do that I need you to keep speaking to me candidly. I need to be able to trust you. And yes, sometimes I will want time alone.”  
Iona nodded. “I’m sworn to protect you. And your secrets. Keep getting me these and I’ll gladly do so.” She took another bite.

“ So why were you selected to be my housecarl?”  
“ Speaking 'candidly'? I worked for the jarl before I was asked to become your housecarl. I didn’t bow deeply enough to Maven’s liking, I reckon. She thought I was a bad influence on the jarl. She has tried to bribe me before I moved in with you.”  
“ Did you refuse?”  
“ I didn’t want to go missing. No. I never have been offered gold because I just never feed her any useful information. Pretend I’m an absolute idiot who can’t put two and two together. She believes she’s superior to everyone anyway. And her guard is a brute. Strong as hell, but not the brightest one. So she believes guards are strong but stupid by default. “  
Mara looked down at the ground. “Even though I threw you out for a few days?”  
Iona shrugged. “I don’t mind the freedom. I was just concerned you were trying to get rid of me. I wasn’t about to give you more reasons to do so.”  
“ How did she respond to it?”  
“ She stopped asking and just told me that those who serve her are well rewarded for it.”  
“ Well. I technically do serve her. Given the Thieves’ guild. It allows me to spare some people she wouldn’t have wanted spared. Especially guards.”  
Iona grabbed the taffy. “How do you eat this thing?”  
“ Bit by bit. Chew on it a bit, then eat it. “  
Iona nodded. “All right. Can I ask you something?”  
“ Hm-hm.” Mara took a swig of her own bottle of wine.  
“ Are you and Brynjolf officially together or just having fun?” Mara spewed out the wine.  
“ I don’t believe that’s how people do that with wine tasting, my thane.”  
Mara laughed. “Is sarcasm a selection criterium for housecarls? I’ve got some people I need to introduce you to.”

Iona seemed to be at ease and Mara enjoyed that thoroughly. But she also seemed determined enough to keep asking; “ I’m asking because Brynjolf has a reputation. As a flirt, but more so as a con. You are a wealthy woman, a thane and a powerful mage. You’re rumoured to be the dragonborn.”  
“ I am. And I am even more than that.” Mara mumbled. “Not that it matters. I am not sleeping with him.”  
“ Was he with you every night?”  
Mara opened her mouth and closed it again.

“ I see. As I said, I am just asking you to be careful. Not to criticise who you bed. I only suggest you do not seek to marry him. I’d hate for you to wind up like Bersi.”  
“ I'm not getting married anytime soon anyway.”  
“ The necklace suggests you seek marriage.”  
“ I know but it doesn’t mean anything. My name is Mara, I’m just wearing the necklace of the goddess I was named after. Is that allowed around here?” Mara sighed. “Sorry. I’ve just… this whole necklace mess. Where I’m from, a ring shows your betrothal as well as who you are married to.”  
“ The same ring?”  
“ Different ring, different finger.”  
“ Then how do you know who is available for marriage?”  
Mara facepalmed. “Really, sometimes Skyrim’s customs are really… ugh. You talk to them Iona. You figure out if you like them enough to be bound to them.”  
“ It seems inefficient.”  
“ It seems romantic.”  
“ Romance is inefficient.” 

Mara chuckled and thought back of how she both really was hoping to still run into Brynjolf and really was hoping she wouldn’t at the same time. “You're probably right. But hypothetically speaking, what is that man's reputation?”  
“ That he'll rob you blind without batting an eye. He's a good manipulator. And that he doesn't settle down. A few past residents have tried over the years."  
" Anyone I know?"  
Iona scoffed. "No. They came and went. Some are rumored to have done literally just that. And I'd like you to stay around in Riften, you’re not half as bad to talk to as I thought. So I'd hate for some con to chase you away.”  
She was halfway the taffy treat and took a swig of her bottle.  
“ Thanks, Iona. Glad we had this talk. Takes the edge off.”  
“ So can I move in again?” The housecarl threw it in as a throwaway remark.  
“ Yeah. Sure. As long as you don’t tell anyone about anything that happens in our house.”  
“ Deal. As long as I can stay in the Bee and Barb on days Brynjolf is… guarding your body.”  
Mara threw a sweetroll in her direction and Iona caught it instantly. “ So now what?”  
“ Now you settle in at home again, dear housecarl. And I go have a chat with Maven…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not as directly Brynjolf-centric this part. Don't worry, he'll be back very soon. But first the whole Housecarl thing had to be settled. As does the Maven part which is coming up next. 
> 
> Iona always seemed very stand-offish in my playthrough (and sort of ran off with my first character's first husband due to game glitches) but also no-nonsense. So that's how she is here, given a chance to talk candidly.


	11. Choice and challenge

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is way overdue - I know. I have been busy as hell -still am- and this chapter was a lost one. Wrote half of it ages ago and did not wanna start over. Found it again, finished it et voila! Consider this the kickstart of the story again. Only one chapter per week until newyear probably though - but I will do my very best to stick to that minimum.
> 
> Sorry for the wait! Hope someone is still interested in reading it after all this time.

When Iona and Mara had walked back through the city gates, Mara noticed Hemming making his way over to her. “Yes?”  
“ My mother has requested for me to escort you to the Bee & Barb.”  
Mara crossed her arms. “Has she, now? I’ll be there shortly. I need to drop some things off and I do not wish an escort.”  
Hemming grabbed her upper arm and held his grip firm as he hissed at her. “She _requested_ me to do that, for you it’s an _order_.”  
Mara batted her eyelashes and smiled at him wide-eyed; “ You’re really not used to being told no, are you?’ She placed a magically glowing hand on his. Feeling the scorching heat burning his skin, he let go of her. Then he looked at her.  
  
“ Oh sorry," Mara twirled her hair a little. "...sometimes I get all hot and bothered.” Her smile was still on her face and he looked utterly confused. “I need a moment to myself. Surely you don’t wasn’t to make a scene out of such a small delay. What would your mother say? I will be there very shortly.”  
She noticed that he considered protesting but favoured inspecting his hand. She healed it quickly before turning and walking to her home without another word.

Iona leaned in as they made their way back to Honeyside. “Hot and bothered, huh? Why did you heal him?”  
Mara waited to reply until the door was shut behind them. “ I’m sure Maven told him very explicitly not to pursue me if he at any point wanted to at all. Confusing him might be helpful. Additionally, let's not give mommy dearest a reason to lock me up. She'd surely pretend it was a murder attempt.”  
Iona was still frowning. “He still doesn’t deserve it.”  
“ He’s an entitled brat. No wonder with Maven as a mother. But if he stays over-confident and believes I'm no real threat, he might actually slip up and say something his mother might not want him to. If she’s keeping an eye on me, I’ll damn well keep an eye on them too.”

Mara quickly showed Iona where she had decided to place what. “I don’t expect you to stay inside constantly. You have a life, live it. This is just your home too and I expect you to check up on it daily when I’m not around. If you want to go elsewhere for longer than that, just let me know and I’ll make sure someone else comes to check up on the place every once in a while.”  
Iona nodded. “ Consider it done.”  
Mara stopped by at her alchemy table and looked into the cupboard. Not as many potions as in some of her other homes but plenty to serve her needs. She placed some small potions in a satchel. One to cause fear, one to cure disease, one to cure poison and finally one to deal damage over time. She didn’t quite want to kill Maven, at least not in such an overt manner, so nothing too heavy.  
“ Are these new?” Iona’s spoke as soon as Mara stood up straight again, closing the cupboard. She was gesturing at the locks on the door. She instinctively brushed her thumb over one of them.

“ Yes they are.” Mara sighed and shook her head. Iona squinted her eyes and crossed her arms.   
“ Why do you look so forlorn at those pieces of metal, if I may ask?”  
“Story for another time. I’m headed out. Feel free to help yourself to some food, I don’t mind.”  
“ Good luck.”  
“Thanks.” Mara tried not to allow her mind to wander to sitting to the floor with him, installing those locks. She couldn’t get distracted now.

Hemming was no longer in sight when she walked back out of the door. She made her way to the inn and found Maven sitting alone, with her bodyguard standing behind her.  
“ So you're the one. Hmm. You don't look so impressive.”  
“ Drop the act Maven, I know you remember me. I’ve got a small collection of assassins’ letters to prove it. So how about we skip the small talk?”  
“You're a firebrand, aren't you? It's about time Brynjolf sent me someone with business sense. I was beginning to think he was running some sort of beggar's guild over there.”

Mara scoffed. “ They managed to get someone opposing you to work for you. You have no faith in the Guild?”  
“ Faith? I don't have faith in anyone. All I care about is cause and effect. Did the job get done and was it done correctly. There's no gray area.”  
Mara rolled her eyes. “So, why did you summon me here? I’m sure we both have something better to do than this.”  
“ This is an important job. I have a competitor called Honningbrew Meadery that I want to put out of business. I also want to know how they managed to get the place up and running so quickly.”  
Mara gritted her teeth and crossed her arms. Putting someone out of business… at least it was the meadery that seemed to have those working there complaining.

“Who runs the show at Honningbrew Meadery? “  
“ Some layabout called Sabjorn. Been a thorn in my side for the last few years now.”  
“ Sabjorn sounds like more than just friendly competition.”  
“ Not a day goes by that I don't regret letting Sabjorn get as far as he did. In only a few short years, he's taken that bile he calls mead to market and a chunk of my profits with it! I can't imagine where he found the gold to take it to market so quickly.”  
“ So get rid of him and he's no longer a threat?”  
“ Exactly. With Sabjorn in prison, his meadery will be forced to close. Then I swoop in and take over the place. No more competition.”  
“ Why strike now?”  
“ The Goldenglow Estate job was undoubtedly interrupted the supply of honey I need to make my mead. Sabjorn could use this interruption to his advantage and collect a larger share of the market. I can't have that."

 

Mara gritted her teeth. She might as well get this over with. “Where do I begin?”  
“"Head to the Bannered Mare in Whiterun and look for Mallus Maccius. He'll fill you in on all the details."  
Mara nodded “Fine.”  
“ One more time in case I wasn't clear. You butcher this job and you'll be sorry.”  
“ Well, in case I wasn’t clear: I know you think of me as the only competent one or I wouldn’t be in this job. I know you probably know who I am. And you’ve already tried to come after me in various creative ways. So let's agree not to get in each other’s way too much during this… unlikely partnership. “  
“ That was before you got hm… what’s the word for it…. let's go with _entangled_ with Brynjolf. He seems to be quite fond of his latest recruit. Rumour has it he is at your doorstep every night. Surely, you wouldn’t want anything to happen to him…”

Mara scowled, turned around and slammed the palms of her hands on the table before looking at the woman again.  
“ I see. You think I care about him. Let’s just say I like to have a man around who is a little rough around the edges for a fun night. But you and I both know that keeping that type around is a risk for a powerful woman unless that man seems hellbent on protecting her out of money, loyalty, the promise of more… “ She glanced up at Maul for long enough that it would be obvious to Maven and then looked back at her with a sly smile. “ … entanglements. Surely, you can relate?”  
Maven didn’t flinch, but Maul shifted a little and glanced down at Maven with a hint of a proud grin. He was lucky that his crime boss couldn’t see him.  
Maven stood up and hissed at Mara, not breaking eye contact for even a second. “ I believe we're done here.”  
“ So do I. I’ll go do your bidding now.” Mara bowed, threw her one more venomous grin and left.

She kept her shoulders pushed back and her head held high when she headed out but she was cursing under her breath. “Whiterun? For fuck’s sake…”  
She noticed Sapphire from the corner of her eye as she crossed one of the small bridges over the water on her way home. She stopped in her tracks, turned around and headed straight for her. “Are you watching me for him?”  
Sapphire raised an eyebrow. “ Hi to you too. You sure think you’re important don’t you?”  
“ Tell him I’m off to shut down a competitor in Whiterun. And to watch his back. Maven does not like me very much right now.”  
“ What’s in it for me?”  
Mara frowned. “Whatever he’s paying you, I guess. And if that’s nothing, well, then you don’t have to tell him.”  
Sapphire sighed, looked left and right and then walked closer to Mara. “ He did not send me but I will pass on your message. Everyone is noticing how you two look at each other. He has been a little less gloomy the past days… until last night. So what exactly is going on?”  
Mara buried her face in her hands for a few second while she exhaled loudly. “Honestly? Oblivion if I know.”  
“ I’m not asking him, am I? What do you want, dragonborn?”  
“ I want to mess with Maven’s power position. Instead I’m doing her bidding. I want to get some kids off of the streets and into a welcoming home. Instead, I am the talk of the town cause of a nightly visitor. I want to be left alone for a few days, instead there’s always something or someone who needs me. I want...”  
“ Our unofficial guild leader?“  
“ A nap. For now. Bye Sapphire. I’m leaving in a few hours.”  
“Everyone can see it you know.”  
Mara turned back around and shrugged. “Well if it was bothering you; we’re strictly professional now. It doesn’t matter what everyone else sees or feels. It’s done.” She turned on her heels again, ignoring the gnawing feeling in her chest.  
“Mara?”  
She didn't turn to face her again but she did stop walking. “ Sapphhire. I seriously have plenty to d-“  
“ Mercer’s out tonight and tomorrow. Brynjolf has been practising lockpicking and has actually been filing papers. Which means he’s more boring than I've ever seen him before. If you want to talk to him alone… better make it back in time.”  
“ Never figured you for a hopeless romantic.”  
“ I’m not. Look, I don't really know you. I don't even really know anyone here. But he’s treated me with respect so far and you don't seem too bad either. He's a stubborn ass, we all know that. But he does give a damn. See you later Mara.”  
Mara kept standing in place, gawking at Sapphire.

Choices. Brilliant.


	12. Poison and wine

Iona had been right. Damnit, her own instincts had been right. There’s always more than meets the eye with Maven. There’s always a catch and it’s usually one that tries to get you in a headlock. Or, in this case, next to a vat of mead, holding rat poison. The scratches and bruises on the places the skeevers had broken though her leather armour were not feeling too great and she was already one cure disease potion down. It had been a cosy mission so far…

\---

Mallus Maccius was a piece of work. His word choice alone send shivers down her spine…’ _You're going to happen by and lend poor old Sabjorn a helping hand.’_ The fact that his voice sounded eerily like that of none other than Mercer Frey was not helping much. Then again, Sabjorn was not much of an improvement. Proudly announcing he tricked Mallus into eternal servitude by lending him some gold he could never repay? They deserved each other. They also both ‘forgot’ to mention the lunatic living in the tunnels. She’d expected quite some things: skeevers, frostbite spiders, … But a damn mage who attacks on sight in the tunnels under a brewery?

The lesson she was learning the hard way still didn’t feel great: do not reason with a man who is trying to kill you. Through her talking and telling him to stand down he managed to get past her shield… she cried out in pain as she looked at her arm. Some sort of eroding substance was eating away at her armour and she saw the pleasure in his eyes when she screeched because it was starting to reach her skin. At that maniacal laughter, she felt the dragon soul within her stir. She cast a frost spell on the goo and managed to it off of her. When she looked up again, she was seeing red.   
  
It had been self-defense but she still felt it gnawing at her. Who knew what his story was, whether he did not just want a peaceful existence with his… well… skeevers. She scoffed, she probably shouldn’t judge people for the company they keep but skeevers? Still, nobody gets that good at magic without practice. Then she found his journal. “ _I will bury Whiterun and watch Winterhold burn. And when they experience the fury I've unleashed upon them, when my progeny are gnawing the flesh from their bones, they will come begging and groveling at my feet. But there will be no mercy, no quarter and no leniency. I will laugh and I will dance and I will rejoice over their mangled, broken corpses_.” She thought of Lucia and threw the journal on his corpse. Just to make sure that if someone found him, they’d know he had been a threat.

“People who don’t seem hellbent on destroying others for their own amusement seem in short supply these days.” She murmured as she was flexing her hands. For good measure, as if she feared the skeevers could run off with it, she doused the flame he had created. She poisoned the nest without second thought. She had felt disease grip at her after one of their bites right until she had taken her potion.

\--

Bringing her back here, standing at the vat. Holding rat poison potent enough to floor Commander Caius for days, weeks, hell maybe even permanently. She had met him before. Not the most charming man but he seemed to care about the city. He had never done her wrong, she had never seen him do someone else any wrong. She would not murder an innocent man for the guild unless she had no other choice. She reached for the vial in her pocket and twirled it. She’d created the poison herself. It makes you feel sick, an array of symptoms one by one, each in turn disappearing before the next: nausea, headache, muscle pain, dizziness, nausea again… Can’t be cured unless you know what’s in it. but it does leave your system after a few days regardless and most symptoms didn’t even force you to be stuck to a bed. It’s something she had intended for Maven. It would work fast enough. She’d just put the bag of rat poison behind the vat. Correlation, causation… she knew it was blurry to most in Skyrim.

“Weird as it is, this at least this may save one life…” she poured the contents of the vial into the vat and magically stirred it. turned and went back to Sabjorn, telling him the job was done. He looked quite unsurprised about the state she was in. Ripped garments, dried blood and dirt on her. “Job’s finished.”  
“Well it's about time! I had to stall the captain until you were finished."  
“What about my pay? “ If this would go as she thought it might, she could maybe even use it to bail him out of jail after the dust settled. After a while… he still had forced a man into servitude. Creating a brand new monster to replace him in Mallus.  
"You'll just have to wait until after the captain's finished. I suppose you can wait around if you must."  
Fine. No bail-out.

She waited at the door, in the shadows. Sabjorn seemed to approve of her ability to stay out of the way when important men came in. " _You assured me this place was clean! I'll see... see to it that you remain in irons for the rest of your days_!"   
So many captains are such dramatic people. Well. Most. She rubbed the ring finger on her left hand again. Next thing she knew Sabjorn got dragged out of the meadery while Mallus greeted her with a grin.   
  
"I don't think that could have gone any better. " Yeah… definitely sounds lie Mercer all right.  
Mara crossed her arms and leaned back. “He forced you to work for him with a loan you couldn’t pay back, huh?”  
“ Hm, so you found out about that.”  
“ I tend to find out about things. You never mentioned that lunatic living in the tunnels.”  
He didn’t seem to regret not telling her anything. No hint of guilt, if anything pride over being insightful enough not to mention it. "I thought it would be better to leave some of the details out of our previous discussion. Didn't want to risk you walking away from the job. Besides, you've done Maven a favor getting rid of him and saved me from wasting coin hiring someone else to do it later. If you're in the area and you ever need anything fenced, you just let me know."

“ Gee, thanks. Worth risking my life over, that. You better have some coin on you next time I stop by with goods.”  
“ Oh, but I’m in business with Maven now: I will.”  
Mara looked around. “What are you going to do with this place?”  
“ Start changing it over to the Black-Briar Meadery West as soon as possible. That was Maven's part of the deal. She's put me in charge of keeping the mead flowing, so that's exactly what I'm going to do.”  
“Oh, I still need to get a look at Sabjorn's books.”  
“ So, Maven wants to hunt down Sabjorn's private partner, huh? You're welcome to take a look around Sabjorn's office. He keeps most of his papers stashed in his desk. Here, this should help." He threw a key her way. “Thanks.”  
  
Heading upstairs she noticed Mallus was revelling in his newfound freedom, planning changes in decor. She rummaged through the papers on his desk and found a promissory note. Instructions and a symbol. “ _I can assure you I’ll do everything in my power to keep her assets and her cronies at bay.”_ No name. A shiver went through her when she realised she was officially one of those cronies now. She sighed before checking out her arm and casting another healing spell. That was gonna hurt for a while. Sabjorn’s office seemed to hold one shiny object that she could take along. A honningbrew decanter… she would not be leaving that for Mallus and Maven. Mallus was too busy revelling over their ploy actually succeeding to even notice that she had not originally brought a bag with her. She had taken all the paperwork, even if just to make Maven’s work harder, several bottles of mead, the decanter and any gold she could find laying around. It wasn’t much, but she hadn’t done it for the spoils. Just to piss off Maven.

Mallus seemed too busy to really notice her leaving. Fine by her. It felt dirty, working for Maven. But maybe she had done some actual good. She intended to leave Whiterun  as quickly as possible. She could greet the friends she had there later. She did not intend to wait around until Mallus figured something was missing and for her to still have it on her person.

She tried to reassure herself that that was the main reason, not the aching in her chest. Not at all. Just like getting that decanter to Delvin as soon as possible was the main reason she wanted to stop by at the guild as soon as possible.

When she reached the gate she stopped in her tracks smacked her forehead and headed towards the Gildergleam. “How did I almost forget this?” When she reached it she saw a little girl, holding a doll.   
“Hi sweetie, how are you doing?”  
“ You’re back!” Lucia crashed into Mara and held onto her legs. “I haven’t sold many flowers today and I’ve seen a Thalmor? He looked scary.” Mara had only met Lucia once before. She had convinced Danica to let her stay in the temple at night, in return for steady donations and for reviving the Gildergleam. Danica seemed kind to the girl, but a temple was no place for a child to spend all day unless she intended to become a priestess.   
“Lucia?”  
“ Hm?” she stopped talking for a second.  
“ I brought you some things, but don’t spend it all in one go. I won’t be back for a while.” Mara handed Lucia 600 gold pieces and plenty of cacao muffins, as well as strawberry tarts.   
“Oh thank you! You're the best! Can you be my mother?”  
Mara tossled her hair. “You already asked me that and usually when I give you money. Don’t think you’ll get that much if I ever become your foster mother. But no, I can’t adopt you yet. Is Danica treating you well?” Lucia nodded her head fervently.   
“Is she feeding you?” Another nod but less enthusiastically this time. When Mara raised an eyebrow the girl spoke up. “She’s feeding me but it’s all vegetable things… a lot of soup. It doesn’t taste very good... She says it’ll keep me healthy.”  
“Buy yourself some food you like on the market.”   
Lucia smiled proudly. “I have been doing  that already.”  
“ That’s my girl.” Mara felt proud of her, though she wasn’t sure if she felt more like a big sister to her or like a mother. Regardless, she had to go. Night was falling and Mallus could find out something was missing anytime now. “ I have to go again, Lucia. I will come back for you, okay? “  
“ Promise?”  
“ Yes.” Mara smiled at her. If need be she’d get a house and a nanny. But she needed some stability in her life before she could a child into it. For now it seemed better to keep her somewhere familiar to her. Where she knew the other kids.

   
“ Lucia?” Danica opened the door to the temple. It had gotten dark outside.   
“ Hi Danica. Nice to see the Gildergleam is doing well.”  
“ It is. Are you staying, too?”  
Mara shook her head. “I have to go right now actually, I have something important to do.”  
She knelt down and hugged Lucia. “I will be back for you, I promise. Okay?”   
The little girl nodded. Then Mara got up, sighed and headed for the city gates. Her mind was elsewhere when she reached the gate. She glanced back at the city. “I just had to go to Riften, didn’t I?” She pushed open the heavy gate and started walking. Her mind kept wandering back to him. Was she going to speak to him or ignore him? She had to go to the guild anyway she supposed.

She heard a twig crack behind her. She conjured her flame atronach instantly and turned around. “Don’t tell me Maven sent y…” Thieves’ guild armour.   
  
“Who the hell are you?” The silhouette stepped closer with raised hands, allowing the atronach’s fire to shed some light on his face.  
  


“Hold your fire.” Mara scoffed until it dawned on her. That voice made her feel cold and warm at the same time, that voice had been in her head so often since... He spoke again. “She didn’t send me. Iona and Sapphire did. Mind an escort? I brought wine…”  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am back! (Sorta.) I've just read some comments on this and they jolted me back into action to write. I've had a pretty shitty year tbh, a lot of things did not go as planned, fell through, challenges were around every corner and more often than not, not the pleasant kind. I've been used and I've nearly broken a few times. So, I'm not too sad to leave 2019 behind. It's also when I started writing this though. It is also when I met some amazing people. It's also when I refound my love for writing. I hate how little time I've had for it but this story is definitely not finished yet. You won't have to wait another year for the next part. ;) Thanks for reading. Thanks for commenting. I can't emphasize enough how inspring that is.


	13. Give it time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Very Brynara heavy. But fair warning: this can be a very painful chapter to anyone who is going through a bad breakup.

Normally, the atronach would start twirling when Mara knew there was no enemy nearby. This time she still held the tension in her shoulders and breathing suddenly required effort. The atronach remained on guard. She could feel her own heartbeat speeding up. And fought the urge to lunge at him and wrap her arms around his neck.  
“ I can’t do this right now. ”  
“ Lass…” he reached for her wrist but she crossed her arms and walked away from him, her atronach trailing beside her as an oversized nightlight. She felt more pain but still hoped he was following her. “Mara.” She stopped, putting down her backpack to get a cloak out of it. A chill had come over her and she didn’t know how much of it had to do with him. It gave her an excuse to let him catch up with her. 

“ Brynjolf. I would ask you what you want from me but you made it clear enough last time that that’s not all that much. I did the job. I’m off to report back to Maven.”  
“ We both know I’m not here for that.”  
“ No? I’m a recruit, you’re my handler.” The pained look in his eyes almost made her stop talking entirely. The urge to hold him again. Damnit. “I’m trying to save the guild and you don’t need to sweet-talk me into doing so. So if you're concerned I'm gonna skip out because we won't work, then feel free to drop it. You’ll get what you want from me without having to promise me anything beyond membership.” She clasped the buckle of the cloak and picked up her backpack again.  
When she turned her back to him, Brynjolf’s voice sounded a lot more vulnerable than before: “ That’s all?”  
She shrugged and pulled her cloak closer around her before responding; “I wasn't the one who made a decision. Do you feel any differently than a few days ago yet?” Silence. She waited while the atronach dissipated, casting them back into relative darkness.  
“ Thought so. I’m leaving.”

“ I just don’t know what to tell you.” He sounded exhasperated but also quite… annoyed. She wasn’t sure whether that sentiment was directed at her or at himself.

She scoffed. “You don’t owe me anything, you don’t need to talk to me. I’ll get over it.” She added under her breath “Hell we never even kissed how hard can it be.” Very fucking hard. And she knew that much.  
“ All right then. Did you get the job done? If I have to be your handler ayway.”  
“ Of course.”  
“ Any difficulties along the way?”  
“ Both men in the brewery are unhinged, one follows Maven even more blindly than you and sounds a whole lot like Mercer, the other is in jail now as she wanted. Oh and I met a wonderful man who intended to burn down two cities with his skeever army and who spilled some acid on me. He's dead. Went to say hi to the chid I intended to adopt months ago but still can't. You know, the usual.”  
“ Hold up, lass. Are you okay?”  
If okay means that becoming a briarheart never seemed more appealing because then she wouldn’t need her heart anymore. “I’m fine.” 

He looked over at her but couldn’t find any wounds or places her clothes had ripped because of the cloak.  
“ So we’re heading over there.” He pointed a clearing with a pond, moonlit. The full moon seemed to be out. She might have been able to shake him off in the darkness otherwise.  
She scoffed. “No, we’re not.”  
“ Yes, we are. I want to check your wounds.” He sounded strict, more than she was used to.  
“ You’re no healer, drop it Brynjolf.”  
“ I am your handler. I am responsible for you. If you muck up a job and get caught due to an injury or , oblivion, even infect Maven with something you got from that lunatic…”  
“ Again, you wouldn’t be able to tell what’s infected or that I'd carry any disease. Don’t pretend this is any more than attempt to get me to get my clothes off.”  
“ There are easier ways to accomplish that.”  
“ Not anymore!” The lighter wording came with a biting undertone. They might sting more than the acid.  
“ I know you don’t need help but again, if I don’t look after you then Iona…”  
“ Divines, what did she do to have you running this scared of her? I might need some pointers from the woman to get you to back off.”  
“ Do you want me to back off?” Silence. She couldn’t get that ‘yes’ over her lips. She wanted to talk to him again and feel his hands on her arm if nothing else was possible. At least it showed he still gave a damn. Or a sliver of it. But she didn’t want to feel this needy or vulnerable. Not to the man who chose someone who made her skin crawl, his status or whatever it was over her.  
“ Please, allow me to check your injuries.”  
Mara exhaled. If she was being entirely honest, the wound stung like hell and she did have an ointment that could fix that until she got home. Once home, she could probably cook up something to avoid scarring.  
She nodded quietly and allowed him to guide her to the waterside. 

He made short work of some mudcrabs that came creaking towards her. She took off her cloak as Brynjolf gathered some branches and leafs to create a fire. She casually flicked a fireball into it and got a bit closer to its heat. She felt irrationally cold. She was quite certain that she had been fine warmth-wise before he showed up. Upon closer inspection, which included her casting magelight, he looked annoyed at the gashes in her leather in her armour but concerned when he saw her arm. It wasn’t looking too great. Not infected, but still. She flinched as he touched the edge of the wound.  
“ You weren’t joking. Acid huh?”  
She nodded.  
“What did you do?”  
“ Ice magic, tore it off after it froze. “  
“ Took any skin with it?"  
" Either that or it was already gone cause of the acid. Nasty stuff, that."  
" Have you looked after it since?”  
“ Not really. The stinging was a welcome distraction after the mission was done.”  
“ Since when does a thieves guild member consider distraction a good…” She looked up at him and raised an eyebrow. "Really?" A lecture on that?  
“ Right. Mind… peeling the top part of your armour off of yourself?”  
“ Kinda, it’s freezing cold outside and I don’t know if skin is gonna come off with it.”  
"It's not cold at all." He put his hand on her forehead. “Doesn’t seem like you’re running a fever.”  
She grabbed his wrist angrily and moved the hand away from her head. “ It’s just cold, all right? It’s not cause you think it’s balmy that everyone feels the same. ”  
“ I’m warm, just get closer to me.” He actually sounded serious. She couldn't have that.  
“ Don’t push it, not one of your conquests. Grab the ointment from my bag.”

He applied the ointment carefully, over the hole in her armour. The ointment eased the pain and cooled the throbbing heat that came off the wound. She tried to focus on a tree rather than on his hand. She needed to find something to talk about. "So Iona found you and threatened you?"  
" Said that I should get my head out of my ass and work things out with you, or she'd treat me as the danger I was to her Thane. And that if any harm came to you on behalf of Maven, she'd find me."  
" At the market?"  
" Near it. Don't worry, nobody heard. She grabbed me by the collar and hissed it at me. Only Sapphire was in hearing distance."  
" What did she say?"  
He scoffed. “ Sapphire asked her to get drink with her after. Iona accepted.”  
“ Sapphire and Iona?”  
“ Yeah.”  
“ Something going on there?”  
“ Looked amicable. But who knows, I’ve never seen Sapphire bring back suitors so I don’t know who she'd be into. Give it time.” He looked up at her with a smile but it faded again fast when their eyes locked. She didn’t know how long they looked into each other’s eyes. But it felt like quite some time. He reached for her and pushed a strand of hair behind her ear. She closed her eyes as his thumb grazed her cheek. He pulled his arm back but let is slide over her unharmed arm. Then he pulled his hand back, shook his head and looked over the water. 

He spoke again. “ I’ve gotten worse at numbers since we… well. You know. Those papers are a right mess now.”  
“ You were always shit at that based on what I’ve heard from Sapphire.”  
“ Nonsense, just had better things to do.”  
“ Not anymore?”  
“ At the moment, I sure do. Not when I thought I had to steer clear from you. Given…”  
“ Yeah. I get it.”  
“ You look cold.”  
“ I am.”  
“ Offer stands.”  
She shivered again and looked at him. Before she knew it she was walking over to him and sat down on his lap, carefully. As if she was literally testing the waters. It still felt right to have him that close. She curled up against him with her head on his shoulder and once she seemed settled, he put her arm around her.

More silence. She broke it. “I missed you.”  
“ Sapphire told me that.“  
“ What else did she tell you?”  
“ That she wasn’t sure if you were gonna kiss me or kill me but that I was no use to the guild in the state I was in so that I had to man up and had to go find you.”  
“ At least I’m still functional.” She revelled in his laughter at that comment. After it died down and she realised she could hear his heartbeat and that hers had eased again too, she spoke up again: “It hurt, you know.”  
“ Your arm?”  
“ That too.”  
A pained smile appeared on her face. He reached for her upper arm and she didn’t try to avoid his touch anymore. “ You can still talk to me, come to me if you need me.” If her heart didn’t ache enough yet it did now. Still, it came as a shock. Given that she was on his lap, had allowed herself to hope...  
“ So that’s… you… didn’t change your mind?” Tears started stinging in her eyes so she turned away.  
“Mara…”  
“ No, I got closer to you. I know. But tell me, why the hell are you really here? Since when do Iona or Sapphire have such a say over you?”  
“ I am with ya because I wanted to be. It’s not because I can’t change my mind that I want to let you go or get hurt for that matter. Or that I don’t want to be near you.”  
“ I can take care of myself.”  
“ I know.”  
“ This guild has had me compromise so many of the things I believe in. I’m one of Maven’s cronies, Lucia still isn’t living with me,…” She got up, and put on her cloak.  
“ Lass… Mara…”  
“ I need some time alone.”

She got her things and shoved the bag with the decanter into Brynjolf's hands. "Get that to Delvin." Then she started walking. Anywhere to get away from him. For a moment, she considered going back to the city, but she decided against it. She still walked in its direction to get a cart. Brynjolf had shadowed her on the way there, she felt him near and somehow felt his worry or pity. Or she had imagined it. Didn't matter. She didn’t want to think of it. She paid the fee, shot one more look at his silhouette and buried her face in her hands. The flashbacks of moments between them didn’t stop coming. When she finally arrived back in Riften, she walked home on autopilot. In the middle of the night she opened and then bolted the door. As she locked the bolts it all felt a little too real. She felt her body shudder with the sobs she had been holding back. With them, the pain eased a little. But not enough. She wanted him there and simultaneously as far away from her as possible. She hated feeling like this. 

“ Mara? What happened?” Iona rushed over to her side with Sapphire beside her. Sapphire kept her distance, unsure if she should come closer.  
Iona looked at Sapphire. “ It was nice to meet you Sapphire, but would you mind…?”  
“ Not at all.” Sapphire put a hand on Mara’s shoulder and looked at her sympathetically before she closed the door behind her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nothing stings like heartache, especially when those involved didn't really want it. This may or may not be based on real life events. But don't worry, I have a plan for these two. This is not the end of this or their story. It gets better.

**Author's Note:**

> Will have a follow-up and how fast that happens depends on whether anyone is reading it I suppose? It's one of those 'ah nobody is reading it... eh I can update in a month' or 'someone likes it/comments so I shall write more asap' things. So you want faster updates, literally all you need to do is ask nicely. :)


End file.
